I’m sure there’s someone out there who thinks the attention we give to choosing our children’s names is a little over the top. And they may be right :) But for me, someone who believes so strongly in the power of the stories we tell ourselves about our lives, a name is more than just an identifier: it is the first lines in a story. And as parents, we get the honor and privilege of writing them. John and I can’t determine the ending of any of our children’s stories, but we can set them in a direction and give them supplies for the road – roots and wings, as I’ve said before. With that, here’s a little more about the name we chose for our daughter…
First, Annie. After we bestowed the name June, which had been my number one since high school, I kept a loose collection of other favorite names in a note on my phone, should we have another daughter. As I added and subtracted options over the years, one sifted to the top: the sweet but not saccharine, feminine but feisty, friendly and optimistic Annie.
True to form for my favorites, it would be at home on any of our grandmas (it was a top 20 name from the 1880s to 1910). It is simple to spell and pronounce, and is familiar but not too common.
Annie Banks-MacKenzie is a central figure in two of my all-time favorite movies, the ones that helped to set my expectations for a loving family and set me on a course toward my future career.
Annie originates from the English Isle and has a definite Scottish feel to it, which is appropriate given my ancestry.
And most serendipitously, Annie Jane is the name of John’s grandmother, which I didn’t learn until years after I fell in love with her name. I never got to meet Annie Jane, but love that we’re able to honor her through our daughter!
So, Annie. But the most common formal name for the nickname Annie – Anne – was just a name for me, without any further meaning or significance (and you know we couldn’t have that, ha!). I puzzled over this for years, until I finally realized that another name on my short list – Susanna – was emblematic of my maternal grandmother’s name (Susanne). Even if our Annie may not use it too often, I was thrilled for another family connection.
I think it’s important to remember here that we don’t name our children after perfect people, but after imperfect people who are a reminder of the story from which they come – one that’s far from perfect, but filled with people who try, who have integrity, who are kind and smart and humble and face challenges and pick themselves back up again and again. As crystallized for me in this essay, I strongly believe (and research backs up!) that one of the best things we can do for our children is develop a strong family narrative. (I wrote more about this in Shep’s name post!)
I’ve written about my grandmother before – she was a deeply layered person, and not always easy to understand. But so many of the things that define me were passed down from her – my love of garden bouquets, boat rides, singing in church, and reading and writing; a belief in thank you notes, correspondence, and a beautifully-set table; and the importance of standing up for the flag at parades, giving back to organizations, and supporting your alma mater. I look forward to introducing Annie to her in the years to come :)
Finally, Liberty! Our other two kiddos’ middle names spoke to our love for America and our love for our faith, respectively, and this one actually combines both. For a Fourth-of-July-week baby, we love that Liberty speaks to the hope, possibility, freedom, and opportunity that’s found in our country more than anywhere else in the world. America is not perfect, but her ideals (including “life, liberty, and happiness”) are beautiful, and we feel lucky to have the privilege of living up to them – and to help our kids do the same.
The idea of liberty and freedom is woven throughout the Gospel, too. Jesus sets us free from death, but even more than that, He has set us free for freedom! When we live with Christ, we don’t have to be weighed down by the comparison, guilt, envy, anxiety, or fear that are so common in our world. We love that Annie’s middle name will remind her about the life that is truly life – a life of abundance, obedience, contentment, joy, and freedom.
So there you have it – much more than you ever wanted to know about our little lady’s name, ha! Thanks for listening, friends, as always.
Friends, this is our sweet Susanna Liberty! She arrived on Thursday, July 8 at 2:26pm, weighing in at 7 pounds, 1 ounce with lots of dark hair. We will call her Annie :)
I am feeling so very grateful for a healthy baby and a safe delivery, for the precious family I already have, and for the true gift of getting to add one more to our crew. She is the absolute sweetest and we all love, love, love her so.
I will be back with more on her name soon! In the meantime, thank you for all the well wishes and prayers!!
As I’ve referred to our Big Lists for baby sister and kindergarten prep over the last few weeks, several of you have asked for more details. I am always happy to oblige, though it almost seems like an overly-simple concept to write about! However, maybe it only seems that way because I’ve been making them for years and years :) Today, I thought I’d share a little more about one of my favorite planning tools, and a few things that are on our prep list for our newest arrival!
Unrelated photo from our Independence Day festivities – June was very proud of her bike decorations for the parade!
I started making Big Lists in college, actually. A glorified to do list, they are especially helpful when there is a defined deadline and discrete tasks that need to be completed – for example, the end of a semester. While in school, I’d write out everything that needed to be accomplished before closing out the term – submitting a final paper, finishing a book, taking an exam, attending a lecture – and break it out by week and/or day. It was easier to pace myself that way, and by breaking things down, no one day or week looked too overwhelming. If I did what was scheduled for that day, I knew I was on track.
When I began my job after college, I used the same technique – most often before a big launch or a long holiday or vacation. Though I couldn’t write down and cross off things like “respond to email,” I could write down every blog post, listing draft, or piece of sales page content that needed to be completed before the deadline.
Now, I use this tool in my personal life, too, with the same parameters – for things with lots of little, discrete tasks and that have a defined deadline. The beginning of kindergarten and the arrival of baby sister are perfect examples.
You may be wondering: what is the difference between a Big List, a to do list, and my monthly PowerSheets goals? Great question, because I have all three :)
My to do list is ongoing, forever and always. It lives in a Word doc. (I know, the most low-tech and simple option out there aside from pen and paper!) It’s broken into three sections: to do today, to do this week, and to do soon. I open up the doc and refer to it multiple times a day, and things get crossed off and added constantly. Since most of my work is done on a computer while sitting at a desk, I don’t really need a mobile system, though I’ll sometimes transfer to dos from my computer to my phone or a piece of paper if I’m out running a series of errands.
This list includes personal and mundane tasks that contribute to the running of our lives and household, and is the repository for everything swirling in my brain: following up with doctors, scheduling appointments, ordering things or processing returns, writing thank you notes, emailing people, setting things up, booking travel, etc.
A Big List exists only for a short, defined period of time and is solely focused on one aspect of life. I like to keep mine in Google Docs, and depending on the magnitude of the deadline, I usually start drafting 2-4 weeks out, though I might start brainstorming and adding items before then. I begin by dumping ideas into the doc, then breaking them out into days or weeks, and breaking the items down into as small of tasks as necessary or possible. From there, I transfer each week’s items onto my to do list to keep the focus for the week in one central place. A digital system also makes it easy to roll things over from week to week if they’re not completed, which I most definitely do.
My monthly goals are drawn less from the current events of our life and more from the priorities I’ve defined in my yearly goal process (thanks to the PowerSheets!). These are ongoing projects with little urgency beyond that I’ve defined them as important to my and my family’s life (though occasionally they do overlap, as in the case of preparing for baby girl and kindergarten!). They live in my PowerSheets and here on the blog.
They are usually more big-picture, and require being broken down into more discrete tasks that go onto my to do list. For example, “edit June in June” is on my July goals list. That might get broken down into choose a song, download footage, cull footage, and edit video – all of which could go on my to do list for various days.
Honestly, writing all of this out makes me feel a tiny bit nutty and over the top, but in reality they are very simple practices that help me get the right things done! (And I’m sure you have similar systems in your own life!) Hopefully at least one of you found this excessively-long explanation helpful :)
And now to close, let’s look at what a Big List can look like in practice, using the example of baby girl’s arrival. These were a few of the tasks on our list, broken out by the week we completed them. Obviously, this list is very custom to our family, but hopefully you can use it as an example of the kinds of things you might want to think about if you’re expecting, and adapt it to your life! Keep in mind, this is also for a third baby :)
Four weeks before: — Gather recipient list for Meal Train — Decide on paternity leave timing — Deep dive into middle names and choose one — Ask Graham about newborn photos and dates
Three weeks before: — Order new baby book — Take car in for inspection — Wrap gifts from baby sister for big kids — Make hospital bag packing list — Communicate with Namesake about goodies
Two weeks before: — Buy Shep’s birthday gifts — Buy John’s birthday gifts — Get newborn clothes out from attic and wash them — Make hair appointment for newborn session — Buy diapers and wipes
One week before: — Move June’s clothing upstairs and stock baby sister’s clothing downstairs — Finish planning outfits for newborn session — Prep for surprises while in hospital — Buy baby sister stuffie with June — Set up diaper changing station downstairs — Hang roman shade in guest room — Brush up on Babywise — Pack hospital bag — Prep travel consent form for June — Check swaddle inventory and buy new, if necessary
Week of birth: — Install car seat — Wash bassinet — Make shot list for newborn session — Update older kid baby books — Set up bassinet in master bedroom — Take car to car wash — Prep hospital playlist — Dust off and unfold stroller
Let’s compare to do list neuroses: do you make Big Lists? Where do you keep your to do list? Monthly goals? I’d love to hear!
P.S. For those of you who have asked, kindergarten prep musings are coming soon to a blog near you! :)
I have unofficially officially declared myself the Queen of Meal Trains. This might sound grandiose, but here’s the good news: the number of people who can hold the title is limitless, and you need absolutely no skills to do so.
Why the title? I believe meal trains are magic. Before having June, I wasn’t really sure if I wanted one: would it feel awkward to ask people for help? Would we really need it? What if they arrived right when I was feeding her or she was crying? What if they stayed to talk for way too long? (Introvert problems, am I right?)
But then she arrived, and the meals arrived, and it was magic. Not having to think about dinner at the end of the day? Magic. Yummy food made just for you? Magic. The feeling of being thought of and cared for by friends? Magic.
And so now, because I know how much it meant to have meals brought to us as new parents, I basically chase pregnant people down on the street to ask if I can set up a meal train for them, or at the very least bring them a meal. (This is only a slight exaggeration.) I don’t want anyone I’m even mildly acquainted with to miss out on having a meal train, either because they didn’t understand the value or because no one thought to ask them. It’s such a small thing, but I’m making it my thing!
Want it to be your thing, too? Here are my best tips:
1. Use MealTrain.com. It’s free! It’s easy to set-up! Absolutely no skill is needed! Just ask your recipient for a few pieces of basic information (address, desired delivery time, meal preferences, number of people eating, allergies, etc.), fill out the online form, and voila! It’s ready to go. I usually recommend running the train on Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays (to give working meal-bringers a weekend option!) for 2-3 months.
Once you’ve activated the Meal Train, a link will be sent to the recipient so they can block dates, add a photo, or make changes as needed, too.
2. Ask everyone. Like seriously, everyone. I used to worry that people might think I was weird or overly-forward for asking. Maybe a closer friend had already set one up? But who the heck cares?! If they already have one, then you have the perfect opening to ask for the link so you can sign up to take a meal – and they’ll be tickled you thought of them. And if they don’t, you’re giving them a huge gift that literally takes ten minutes of your time.
3. Offer to send an email. I know it can be awkward to ask for help, which is why I always request a list of email addresses to send the meal train to on behalf of the recipient. I strongly believe people want to help, and when you give them an easy way to do so, they’ll gladly jump on board! I’ve found there is a huge difference between the number of sign-ups when an email is sent and when one is not; this is almost always due to the direct ask, not the size of the friend network. (And if someone sets up a meal train up for you and doesn’t think of this, do not hesitate to ask if they’d mind sending one! I’m sure they’d be thrilled to!)
On a related note, if you’re passionate about bringing meals, this post has 10 great dinner ideas for new parents, and a few of my favorite tips. The only thing I’d add a few years out: it is 100% okay to bring a store-bought meal or takeout favorite. In fact, I did just that this weekend – our life is a little too crazy right now to make an extra home-cooked meal, but I happily picked up a few favorites from Donovan’s Dish and delivered them on Saturday afternoon to a new mama friend. If you’re self-conscious about your cooking or worried about getting the delivery timing right, this is a great option!
I would love to hear: do you have an acts of service “thing”? Do you always remember to write condolence notes? Do you watch friends’ kids so they can go on a date night? Do you send a Starbucks gift card for big days or hard weeks? (I have a friend who is consistent with doing this the week friends go back to work after maternity leave – so sweet!) And if you don’t yet have a thing, I hope this post (or the comments!) might inspire you to choose one! :)
