Ten year dativersary

4 February 2015

Ten years ago last week, a boy named John Thomas called up a girl named Emily Ayer and blurted out, “So… I think I like you.” Around her nervous giggles, they set a first date – ice skating at the local rink. About halfway through, he pulled her over to the boards and asked if she wanted to go out with him… to which she replied, “I thought we already were!” (It was her first date ever, so we’ll forgive her confusion.)

Ten years plus one day, an interstate move, two cats, countless travels, a college graduation apiece, one engagement, one wedding, and one house later, John and Emily went ice skating again, this time outdoors in the crisp clear air and under the bright lights of downtown Raleigh.


I’ve already shared our full love story, so I won’t repeat it again here. But our relationship, aside from my relationship with God, has been the defining story of my life, and so our ten year dativersary deserves at least a small mention! As I wrote in an anniversary card to John, my life has been immeasurably richer, richer than I could ever have imagined, for having him in it, and that is something to celebrate.


This excerpt from Mere Christianity was read at our wedding. When I first came across this passage, soon after John and I started dating, I pretty much hated it. I thought it was unromantic, and untrue. Ten years on, I find it both terribly romantic, and more true every day. To me, it represents perhaps the best that one could hope for in a relationship: that you have a deeper love for each other with every passing year. That has been the case for us, and I am grateful.


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February 4, 2015 9:48 am

Happy Dativersary!! May you have many more great dates! It’ll be 10 years for Ben and I in June :)

February 4, 2015 10:03 am

You guys are the best. We are so lucky to call you our friends. Your relationship is inspiring and we are grateful for your example. Enjoy celebrating! xoxo

February 4, 2015 1:00 pm

Happy Dativersary! I love that C.S. Lewis quote. My husband and I will celebrate our ten-year dativersary in April!

February 4, 2015 2:17 pm

Awwww!!! Happy 10 years of dating to you & your hubby.

February 4, 2015 3:09 pm

This photo of you two is the cutest! Happy 10 years of Em & John!

February 4, 2015 3:38 pm

Yay! Happy happy anniversary! Even after marriage, it’s still fun to celebrate the anniversary of a first date. Those pre-marriage years are just as important! And SO fun/funny to look back at.

February 4, 2015 8:05 pm

I am so happy for you. Much love.

February 9, 2015 1:09 pm

Oh I just love this! Happy dateiversary :)

June 24, 2015 4:43 pm

That passage really spoke to me when I first heard it at your wedding, and I thought it was a wonderfully wise and brave choice to have it read at the ceremony. I have always remembered it – thank you!