Four years of marriage

15 September 2016


It’s become somewhat of a tradition for me to offer a few thoughts on our wedding anniversary. Year one I shared two things that had changed in our first year of marriage. Year two I shared a few pieces of marriage advice. Year three I shared about serving each other. And on our last dativersary, we talked about marrying the kind one.


This year, I wanted to share some advice from the priest who officiated Lisa and Dave’s wedding.


(Sidenote: Isn’t being invited to a wedding the greatest?! Not only do you get to celebrate with dear ones on one of the most momentous days of their life, possibly see far-flung friends and family members, twist and shout on a dance floor, and get dressed up, but, if you’re already married, you get to be reminded of the beauty and sacredness of your own commitment. And sometimes, apparently, you even get marriage advice!)


Anyway, I took several notes on my iPhone throughout their priest’s homily (which is pretty impressive in and of itself), but over the last year and a half I’ve continually returned to one. I’m paraphrasing, but this was the gist: “Human love runs dry, but divine love never does. Every day, ask for a portion of Jesus’ love for your spouse, and do you think he will give it to you? Of course!” There are several things I love about this advice:


I love that it reminds me of the great love the Father and Son have for John, and for me. Seeing him through their eyes instead of my own is always a fresh view.
I love that I have access to a well much deeper than my own. Even if I am predisposed to be grumpy or tired or stubborn or snippety, I need only to ask — and truly want — just a piece of Jesus’ patience, kindness, gentleness, and generous spirit, and it will be given to me.
I love that it reminds me of the goodness of Jesus, how good his love is, and what a perfect example he is for all of my interactions every day. Just the smallest portion of his love is better than mine could ever be.


Tonight we are heading out for Italian at a newish restaurant in Durham, just the two of us. I can’t wait to get dressed up and spend time with my favorite person, reminiscing over the last four years and dreaming about the next four!


P.S. Should you want to read more about our wedding – you are in luck! It is one of my most favorite topics :) Most posts can be found here, and our (biased, but) amazing wedding film is here.

P.P.S. All of these photos are by Tanja Lippert, from our ceremony. Again, I’m biased, but she actually is the most talented wedding photographer of all time – or at least close to it :)

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September 15, 2016 8:16 am

Happiest anniversary!!! We just love you two :) And I’m so, so happy and touched that you took this great nugget of wisdom from our ceremony–hearing you talk about it is such a good reminder to me of what was said that day, and I am grateful for that!

Also, seriously. No bride has ever worn Christos quite like you :) Xo!

September 15, 2016 8:24 am

Happy anniversary!! I love your love + marriage posts so much and it put a huge smile on my face to read this! :)

And yes, those photos are divine and you were a gorgeous bride!!

September 15, 2016 9:02 am

Happy, happy anniversary to you two! I always love (LOVE) reading your advice on marriage, love, and faith; even more so now. We’ve been reading Tim Keller’s The Meaning of Marriage together, as well as listening to his podcasts/sermons on marriage. Tim’s wisdom, along with the Bible, ties in so perfectly with what you wrote today! I feel more and more equipped to love well (which I thought I was already, but… ha!).

Enjoy your date night!! xoxox

PS: Four years later, I still draw SO much inspiration from your wedding!

September 15, 2016 9:49 am

Happy memories! Happy anniversary to a wonderful couple!

September 15, 2016 11:02 am

Wow! I’m not married yet, but that is some great advice. I’ll always remember it! :) Also, I wanted to know if you had a post about learning to live with your significant other? Forgive me if I’ve overlooked one that you’ve done, but I’d love to see it! :)


September 16, 2016 9:42 am

Stephanie! The Meaning of Marriage has been on my list for awhile after hearing so many stellar reviews… I need to get on it!

September 19, 2016 12:43 pm

I’m 2/3 finished, and it is AMAZING. Like… so, so, so unbelievably good. I think you would love it and glean so much wisdom!

Kelly Strawberry
September 19, 2016 7:18 pm

Happy anniversary! Love this post – and all your posts- and the Godly wisdom you always share.

September 20, 2016 6:14 pm

I love that advice shared from the homily! I’m going to tuck that one away to draw upon at the start of my marriage. :)