November 2025 goals

Hello, friends! This last month has held multitudes. We spent the first half packing up our first home and the second half settling into our new home. We weathered the news of the original buyers backing out – and went under contract with new buyers – all while the movers shuttled our belongings between houses (a wild day). We’ve now met every neighbor on our cul-de-sac. We have loved walking to school most days. I have thoroughly enjoyed the process of purging, tossing on-the-fence items with glee and freedom. Our maple out the front windows has been ablaze and an abundance of squirrels are frolicking in the backyard with abandon.

Megan McArdle once wrote about how young adults setting off on their own subconsciously expect to start at their parents’ standard of living – which is, of course, the standard their parents ascended to over a lifetime, and likely far from where they started as young adults. They want to shop at the same stores, eat the same foods, take the same vacations, and live in the same sort of house with the same sort of furnishings. When their budget or circumstances don’t allow them to continue in “the style to which they’ve become accustomed,” they can feel cheated.

John and I had (and have) plenty of failings, but this was not one. I’ve written before about how we mostly reveled in our scrappy phase, that time of our lives when cardboard boxes were our coffee tables and splitting a Chipotle burrito was a grand night out.

I’ve been thinking about this idea a lot lately, wondering about its relevance to my current predicament. I find myself impatient that our home does not feel like us, that it does not feel “finished.” Which, when I write it out, seems absolutely ridiculous. Of course it doesn’t feel like us! Of course it isn’t finished! We’ve lived here for three weeks!!

I suppose I didn’t feel this way when we moved into our first home because we were moving from an apartment and there was no comparison – the home was an obvious upgrade. Updates didn’t feel urgent, which was good since our budget required making changes slowly. Over 12 years, though, little by little, we built our home into a place that met our needs and suited our tastes.

And now that home, so lovingly tended over time, stands in direct comparison to this one — which, while objectively nice, mostly does not feel like us. And so there is a desire to make it that way, and fast, to get back to what we had while also moving forward. I want the backsplash gone, the light fixtures switched out, the rugs in place, the built-ins built — all the things we worked so hard for in our past home, transposed to this one.

These are not necessarily bad desires. It is okay to want a home that reflects my tastes and meets my family’s needs and wants. Our life and finances look very different than they did 12 years ago, and moving quickly in this sweet and fleeting season of middle childhood can be wise. But when these desires stop me from appreciating what is in front of me, or drive me to move faster than my family is ready for, they sour the good that’s here now.

So that’s where I am – wanting our new home to feel like home, and reminding myself that transformation won’t happen overnight. And through it all, just trying to unpack the rest of the boxes :)

Big kids working hard to put together new shelves for the attic, in the loft! They were so proud to do it all by themselves!

One other little update, mostly for my memories but also hopefully as an encouragement: I did take my solo trip to New England, and it was wonderful! I spent almost no time doing any of the touristy things I envisioned (walking my favorite road, going out for breakfast, shopping in downtown) and instead spent basically the entire Saturday in conversation: five hours at the baby shower and three hours at dinner with my beloved high school teacher-turned mentor and friend. I am incredibly grateful for that time with those women. Let this be an encouragement to take the flight, make the time, be there in person. And thank you, Lord, for allowing me to do so!

Walking to dinner in Mystic, CT

On my calendar:
— A special date night! We’re taking a mini road trip to Winston-Salem to see one of our beloved babysitters in her senior play at UNC School of the Arts and hopefully grabbing dinner with friends beforehand.
— Meeting up with the cousins at the zoo on a teacher work day. It is supposed to be frigid – fingers crossed the lemurs brave the cold and venture outside!
— A trip to the mountains for Thanksgiving with my family. Menu texts are currently flying fast and furious.

What I’m loving right now:
— With the dark coming on earlier and fall extracurriculars ending, the kids have had a renewed interest in board games. Sushi Go Party, Monopoly Deal, Zombie Kidz, and chess (this is how they learned) are in the nightly post-dinner rotation.
— Having known Lara Casey and Katelyn James up close for over a decade (almost 20 years for Lara!), I can tell you that they are both as genuine and faithful as they come. This conversation between them about business and faith was honest, hopeful, and so good that I stopped it halfway through to tell John we needed to listen to it together.
— You get a mini tree in your room starting the Christmas you’re four, which means Annie’s finally eligible! I just checked and our very favorite flocked 4-footer is back in stock. We now own five of these – two flanking our front door and one in each child’s room. More Christmas decor from our actual home rounded up here!
— Are you sleeping on ThredUp? Don’t do it! My trick is to set alerts for just a few favorite, expensive brands (for me, Faherty and Alice Walk) in my sizes so I don’t have to spend time looking. I just bought a perfectly fall dress for 1/3 of the retail price and I’m always on the hunt for more of my very favorite striped tees.

As a reminder, you can find allll the things I’ve loved over the last few years neatly organized right here!

What you’re loving right now:

This is where I highlight a few items here that have been popular in the last month with fellow readers, based on my analytics. Here’s hoping this will help you find something you’ll love!

— My Lulie Wallace ESV New Testament Journaling Bible. Our next sermon series is on Luke!
— The new eucalyptus + rosemary cleaning spray I’ve been using. Kind of reminiscent of the Thymes Fraser Fir candle but non-Christmas-y enough for year-round use.
— The Eby Relief bra. I’m tickled so many of you are trying one of these! I hope you love them as much as I have!
— The tiniest white noise machine – perfect for traveling.
— The Yoto card case. We now have two: one for cards geared to younger ears, and one for longer chapter books.

Last month on The Connected Family:
— Things that require attention | An incomplete list.
— Our 10 favorite live action family movies | Babe, Homeward Bound, and more.
— Let’s talk about the updates to Instagram’s Teen Accounts | What do we think?
— To be in love with the real world | Ancient human practices are the best antidote for a screen-filled life
— 7 habits that help me live a low-screen life | Including where I charge my phone and when I pick it up in the morning

What I read in September:
— American Wife | Though I’m about 20 years behind in reading this book (it released in 2009), I’m considering it better late than never! Alice, the main character, is a thinly-veiled Laura Bush, but Curtis Sittenfeld paints a compassionate picture of a woman who is fully her own — and easy to fall in love with. Spanning over a lifetime, American Wife reads more like a marriage portrait than anything else. My one complaint: instead of being divided into chapters, it’s split into just four hard-to-stop-turning-the-pages sections. That made for some late nights :)
— The Love Haters | I’m not sure I’m cut out for romances, pals! This one was clean, funny, and had likable characters (including a Coast Guard rescue swimmer, close to my heart!). Still, it just felt like… it didn’t matter? I suppose I’d rather read something a little more substantive — something that leaves me in awe of its prose or helps me see something new about the world — in the limited time I have to read. I know I’m in the minority, here, though!

My reading list for 2025! I’m 13 / 24 so far.

Revisiting my October goals:
Gather our family Halloween costumes (Done! We went with a Star Wars theme – Princess Leia, Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker, Rey, and R2D2 :))
Help my Dad get his Storyworth off to print
Finish editing June in June (Done, finally!!)
Edit Sheptember
Make Halloween ghosts with Shep (This was highly overambitious with all the move to-dos – we only got our Halloween box out three days before the holiday!)
Make a plan for my solo weekend in New England
Choose a Christmas recital song and begin to practice
Send care packages to our college gals
Choose and order our Christmas cards (Designed the photo card, just need to finish the newsletter.)

November goals:
— Lovingly hand off our first home well, equipping the new owner as I’d want to be equipped
— Finalize plans for June’s tenth birthday (in January)
— Begin painting the kids’ 2025 book ornaments!
— Buy window candles, a Christmas tradition I’m so delighted our new home allows us to partake in
— Choose and order sconces for two spots in our home
— Help my Dad get his Storyworth off to print
— Edit Sheptember
— Practice my Christmas recital song
— Send care packages to our college gals
— Finish designing, order, and send our Christmas cards

As a reminder, many of these are drawn from my 2025 PowerSheets goals!

I know I have a ton of carry-over goals from October to November, but with the worst of the unpacking behind me, I’m feeling hopeful I’ll be able to make significant progress as we close out the year!

Friends, I would love to hear: Is there a project or goal that you’re really hoping to finish by the end of 2025? Personally, I’m hoping to wrap up most goals by the end of the month so I can focus on Advent and Christmas in December. Godspeed to us all and I would love to hear about what you have planned in the comments! xo

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