Is it too late to talk about Easter baskets? (Nah – you’ve still got a weekend and a week to prep, if you need it! :))
I know they’re not for everyone, but I’ve really grown to love the opportunity they give me to highlight an important holiday in our faith, support small businesses, replenish basics at the turn of the season, and create some magic for my little ones. And personally, as a creative person, they’re just really fun for me to collect, curate, arrange, and fluff! I might enjoy them even more than the kids.
(If you’re curious, I’ve written extensively on my feelings about Easter baskets in the past – this post captures why I love them and feel they’re an important part of our faith tradition! This post covers some of my tips for keeping baskets budget-friendly.)
Onto the stuffing! Before I get into the 2022 specifics, here are a few things I consider including each year:
— A Bible or faith-based book to add to our library. I’ve rounded up some of our favorites here. (I try to buy these from a local source when possible, like Quail Ridge Books or McIntyre’s Books!) Of course, Write the Word Kids is also a perfect pick for 5-12-year-olds.
— Pajamas. These usually come from Hanna Andersson, Old Navy, or my favorite consignment sale.
Now, here’s what’s going in our little ones’ baskets this year!
Both June and Shep will have a pair of hand-me-down pajamas I set aside from the last load my sister brought over, a few bath bombs, and a matching bathing suit (reader, I could not resist – this for June, this for Shep, and this for Annie). They’ll also have a new box of chalk I couldn’t fit in either of their baskets. In addition, they’ll have a few individual items:
Annie, age 9 months, will have her bathing suit. And actually, her basket is back-ordered until May, so she will have… nothing :) But I’m sure she will be thrilled, regardless!
If you’re celebrating with baskets, what’s your favorite find for this year? Happy fluffing! :)
I’m not exactly sure how to feel about my goals as we wrap up the first quarter of 2022.
On the one hand, I have objectively made some fantastic progress so far with my 8 goals for the year. And that’s wonderful, because they’re all things that really matter to me! On the other hand, that progress seems to have come, either directly or indirectly, at the expense of two of my very favorite things: writing here and reading. (I’ve read three books so far this year – very slow for me – and am continually overestimating how many blog posts I’ll be able to share in a month.)
Are you familiar with the idea of equilibrium and disequilibrium in child development? Kids’ abilities often develop at different rates – they might experience a surge in their physical abilities, but lag in their ability to express themselves. When their various abilities are out of sync, they’re in disequilibrium and more easily frustrated; when their abilities even out, they’re in equilibrium and generally happier and at ease.
I think I might be in a little bit of the grown-up version of disequilibrium right now. That feels like a good way to describe the work of balancing competing priorities – with some surging ahead and some lagging behind – as other factors (growing kids, our social schedule and activities) shift underneath. I know we all experience this at different times – sending a hug if it’s hitting you in this season, too! This, too, shall pass.
Our St. Patrick’s Day after school snack
On my calendar this month: — Opening night of our high school’s spring musical! One of our beloved babysitters is the lead and June is excited to bring her flowers. — Jekyll Island for spring break! Yes, we’re headed back… this time with another family member in tow! — A trip to the WRAL Azalea Gardens when everything’s in bloom.
What I’m loving right now: — I know it’s old news, but John and I watched Only Murders in the Building a few weeks ago and it was an absolute delight. I am predisposed to love anything Steve Martin and Martin Short do together, Selena Gomez rounded out the trio perfectly, and the sets were gorgeous. It’s one of those shows that I wish I could experience watching for the first time a second time. — I have tried MANY kinds of natural deodorant over the years (Schmidt’s, Acure, Native…). Most were good-enough initially, but all seemed to lose their efficacy over time. My newest find is a little less flashy but, several months in, doing a superlative job. Summer will be the real test, but so far I highly recommend! — I listened to this episode of Honestly right after I read “Your Bubble is not the Culture,” and I thought they intersected in interesting ways. Made me think of a pairing we’d dig into for Articles Club!
As a reminder, you can find alllll the things I’ve loved over the last few years neatly organized right here!
What I read in March: — Gentle and Lowly: I loved this book, which was unlike anything I’d read before. Based on Matthew 11:28-29, one of the only places in the Bible where Jesus describes himself (“I am gentle and humble in heart”), it’s a quiet, ponderous read that invites you to take it in slowly: it examines one small piece of scripture per chapter, and leans on a lot of writing from the Puritans (yes, really). My biggest takeaway was that rather than drawing away from or merely tolerating his people in their sin, that is when Jesus loves us the MOST – because he loves us so much, and hates sin so much, his love for us is most “activated” when he sees us hurt by it. (Kind of similar to seeing a loved one suffer from a cancer.) As humans, we constantly underestimate the overwhelming love of Jesus and God the Father, but this book helped to illuminate it for me.
Revisiting my March goals: Cull and sort the first six months of 2021 photos (No real progress here – other things took priority!) Lay out 2013 in family album Lay out 2014 in family album and send it to print! (Waiting on a 40% off sale – which happens every other month or so – to pull the trigger, but it is in the cart and ready to go! HOORAY!!!) Finish the Best of EFM page (Ditto to photo sorting) Complete the third month of our fam Peloton challenge (Done! This was a much-needed and enjoyable kick start to our “comeback tour,” as John and I like to call it.) Do PT exercises daily (Almost daily!) Visit two community groups (One didn’t end up working out with our schedule, but we visited the other and it was lovely! Will continue!) Follow the Matthew reading plan Memorize another piece of scripture with June Buy a small freezer for our garage (Not yet… marital conversations continuing…) Refresh mantel for spring (with the help of this cutie garland from my friend) Prep for Easter baskets Book camping trip (Done! We’ll be glamping for our tenth-anniversary trip!!)
April goals: — Cull and sort the second six months of 2021 photos (hope springs eternal?) — Design and print camping tees for our tenth-anniversary trip — Choose format for EFM book and complete years 2008, 2009, 2010, and 2011 (this feels like a MASSIVE goal) — Write down 2-3 weeks of “brainless” meal plans — Choose a way to serve at church on Sunday mornings — Make a final kitchen contractor decision and get a start date on the books (we’re so close!) — Clean out kitchen cabinets in advance of our kitchen project — Take our first bike ride as a family of five!
As a reminder, many of these are drawn from my 2022 goals!
Do we want to talk about disequilibrium and equilibrium, or does that just make us feel tired, ha?Which are you experiencing right now, if you’d like to share, or what’s a trade off you’re currently wrangling? (Here’s a perennial one of mine.)
This is a post years and years and years in the making.
It will likely come as no surprise that names are one of my favorite topics to think and talk and write about, but though I’ve devoted many words to discussing the names we actually chose for our three children (June, John Shepherd, and Susanna), I’ve never talked about the runners-up. Like, not ever. We hold our names close to the vest – even speculatively, and even in casual conversation, I’ve kept pretty tight lips when discussing future children’s names… forever.
But now that we have closed this chapter and all our names have been given out, discuss this topic we shall! I’m excited to talk about some of the other names we considered for our kiddos, and other names I love.
A few days before Annie was born, I clicked over to Nameberry to pull a few details for her name post. While there, I got sucked into their Baby Name DNA quiz, which labels your naming personality. (Take it here, if you’d like!) I was labeled a Charmer-Romantic, and I found it to be quite accurate:
This description reflects a lot of what we valued when choosing our kids’ names: that they are easy to spell and pronounce, that they’re not too “out there,” that they are “slightly rarer with a touch of whimsy,” and – ding ding ding! – that they are “personally significant to you in some way.” Here are the names Nameberry suggested a Charmer-Romantic might like:
I do, in fact, like most of these names in a general sense, and as you’ll see below, a few of them were even on my short list! Interestingly, I wouldn’t have chosen most of the names on Nameberry’s list of “names similar to Annie” (though I am, of course, partial to my own :))
With that background, what names were on our short list? Boys first, since, as you know, that was a much shorter short list!
William | This one was on my radar since high school. It’s classic, friendly, simple, sharp. I like the nickname Will. However, we had little personal connection to it, and it is a bit more common than I’d like.
Robert | My beloved Dad’s name! We would have gone with his nickname (Rob) over all the other options. However, it can sound a little harsh (you know, bank robbing and stuff), and is one of those names that sounds kind of funny on a baby :)
Hugh, Tate, and August | I’m lumping these together because they all fall into the same category for me: friendly-sounding, simple, classic names that I liked and jotted down over the years. I have no negative connotations with them, but also no personal connection to them. And August was pretty much out since we knew we’d have a June.
Washington | Before we knew Annie was a girl and we were kicking around potential names for a second boy, this was our top pick. It’s pretty bold, and we couldn’t really figure out a good nickname (Ash? Asher? Neither are really our style), but we loved its unabashed patriotic flair. (Of course everyone knows about George Washington, but I gained even more appreciation for him after I read His Excellency. Highly recommend!)
Aaaaaaand… that was it! Onto the gals!
Here are a few other names we considered for our daughters:
Mae | I absolutely love this name – sweet, simple, classic, lovely – and it would have been my top pick for a second girl if our first had not been named June. Without going full-on calendar theme for our kids, though, this one was unfortunately out.
Glory | We didn’t seriously consider this as a first name (a little too out there for our taste) but it was down to the wire as a middle name for Annie – we even had a pros and cons list debating our final two options. We loved the resonance for our faith, similar to Liberty, and just thought it was such a bold, confident, elegant choice that could guide our girl as she grew into her calling.
Sadie, Sally, and Scout | These three ring similar bells for me! Throwback in feel, sweet, fun, confident, simple, cheerful. Scout, of course, is plucked from my favorite book of all time, which makes me adore it, but in the end it was a little too off the beaten path for us. I think Susanna definitely fits in with this crew!
Claire | Another favorite! Lovely, simple, and strong, this is “one of those special names that is familiar yet distinctive, feminine but not frilly, combining historical depth with a modern edge,” as Nameberry puts it. I couldn’t agree more! Happily, my sister- and brother-in-law chose this for their daughter, so I still get to enjoy it in our family.
Eliza and Liza | To me, these could be described the same way as Claire – familiar yet distinctive, feminine but not frilly, historical depth, etc. Both get bonus points for nodding to my beloved Mom (though she spells her Elisabeth with an s). Since being added to my list Eliza has inched ever closer to the top – in an alternative universe, if we were to somehow have another child in a few years, I might put my money on this one.
Louisa | This one has such strong literary associations, which endears it to me. It feels elegant and strong but also lends itself to bubbly nicknames.
Swannanoa | A total wildcard to round this list out! We never seriously considered naming a child this, but bantered it around as a whimsical option :) It’s inspired by the Swannanoa River that runs through Asheville, a place that holds so many memories for us, and the poet in me loves its lyrical sound. Just try saying it out loud! So lovely. Annie could have been a nickname here, too.
And there you have it! This feels a little like baring my soul, ha. If you’d like to bare yours, please comment with some of your top name contenders for future children, your name runners-up if you already have children, or just plain names that you love. (Of course, from personal experience, I’d also understand if even typing them in the comments of a random blog post feels too revealing! :)) Let’s have at it!!
Since our first baby, we’ve gone out to eat as a family. The experience of eating out is something John and I enjoy, and so, like other things we enjoyed pre-babies, we want to fold our kids into this aspect of our lives and are willing to put in the work to make it happen. And though there are moments of fun and joy and ease, make no mistake – there are also meals that feel like straight-up work. Teachable moments abound! :)
We have found the work to be worth it, though. I also can’t help but love that dining out is a distillation of so much we’re trying to teach our kids – kind of a fun pop quiz along the way! They’re learning to have patience, show respect to the people around them, converse with their fellow diners, flex their manners, and grow in confidence as they speak up and order their own food – among other things!
Today, I thought I’d share a few of the super-simple strategies that have helped our kids (currently 6, 3, and 8 months) enjoy restaurant meals alongside us.
First things first: I do not have a list of magical toys that keep my children quietly occupied and in their seats for hours. I wish!! Activities and toys at the table can sometimes be helpful, but in our experience, they can also be more trouble than they’re worth: the toys can quickly clutter the table, causing things to be knocked onto the floor. The kids might bicker over who gets which item. And sometimes our kids will cycle rapidly through the options and lose interest, only to seem more antsy than before.
For better or worse, what keeps our kids happy and behaving well at a restaurant is our pure, unfiltered, full-strength attention. You saw that one coming, yes? :) At these sweet ages, having our undistracted attention is precious, and they completely soak it up. Does this mean we have less time for grown-up conversation? Yes. Does this mean we are on our toes throughout, and the meal is a bit less relaxed? Yes. But again, for us, the extra effort on our parts is worth it – and when we go in with the expectation that we’ll be engaging as a family instead of just enjoying grown-up company, it usually is a very sweet and memorable experience.
So what do we do together as we wait for our meals, eat, and wait for the check? Here are a few of our favorite super-simple activities:
— I Spy. A classic! — Favorites. Take turns asking each other “favorite” questions, like favorite color, restaurant, fruit, book, etc. — Vacations. This is similar to Favorites, but travel-themed! Reminisce on past vacations and chat about favorite destinations, meals, activities, etc. for each person at the table. Start lots of sentences with, “remember when…?” :) — TheAlphabet Game. Choose a category (animals, foods) and name something in that category for every letter. — Places. If you have spellers, go around in a circle, each saying the name of a place (town, state, country, whatever) that starts with the last letter of the previous place. For example, France –> Edmonton –> Nigeria. — Animal sounds. Be careful with this one, because it can get rowdy in the wrong hands, but the gist is: one person makes an animal sound, and everyone else has to guess the animal. — Guess the object. Go around the table. One at a time, have each person close her eyes, then place something in her hand and have her guess what it is. — This or that or would you rather. Ocean or pool? Brownies or chocolate chip cookies? Would you rather eat the same thing for the rest of your life or never eat the same thing twice? — Circle the letters. If there’s a paper menu, have them circle all of a certain letter one at a time (all the B’s, then all the M’s, etc.). — Conversation cards. Cultivate makes my absolute favorite and – spoiler alert – there’s a kids’ version coming soon :) But the OG is still great for kids, too! — Names. See if they can remember the full names of loved ones – grandparents, cousins, etc. First, middle, last! Birthdays are fun, too. This often spirals into talking about memories with each person, which is perfect.
A few other random tips that have helped us:
— We make our expectations clear before we arrive at the restaurant, because they can’t meet an expectation they aren’t aware of. We remind them we’re on the same team and how much we love having fun experiences with them – and that one of the reasons we’re able to have these experiences is because they do such a nice job when we go out. John and I get to set the tone and build them up!
— Don’t have the kids’ food come first. If necessary, pack some Cheerios or give them a snack in advance, but if the kids have long since eaten by the time the grown-up food arrives, you’ll be stuck trying to eat and entertain them at their antsy-est.
— Look for a loud restaurant. Even though the Sunset Terrace was upscale, it was bustling and almost boisterous, so we weren’t worried about every little noise our kids made. We learned this lesson at The Obstinate Daughter when June was only a few months old, and it has served us well! Noise level matters a lot more than level of luxury.
— A short walk can help a long wait. Better to get a few wiggles out, or reset sibling dynamics, before things get bad than wait until we’re at a boiling point. We’ll usually send out one parent-child pair at a time while the others hold down the fort at the table. Of course, some restaurants have full lawns or places to play while waiting, and we’re all about taking advantage of those when available.
— We are not above having our children watch something on a phone if the circumstances are beyond our control. For us, this usually means we’re at a leisurely dinner with loved ones we don’t see often and want to be able to soak up conversation. That being said, we will still resist this as far as it’s possible – building these skills are just that important to us (even more important than in the car!).
Some meals will go poorly. Some will be magical. What we have found – gratefully – is that people seem to appreciate when an effort is being made. It is SUCH an encouragement when another diner leans over to issue a compliment, and I try to pay it forward whenever I see another family doing their best with small (or big!) kids.
Friends, I’d love to hear: what helps you and the kids you love enjoy dining out together? Any other fun non-toy-based games to throw in the ring? :)
