Here’s a funny little post for you! Beginning when June was about 9 months old, we’ve participated in research studies at our local universities several times a year. When I mention this to friends, I’m often met with both interest and confusion, so I thought I’d share a bit about it today! Let’s do a little Q&A…
No photos of the studies, so here’s baby June at her first Duke game!
What do you mean by research studies? We happen to live by three major research universities (UNC, Duke, and NC State) and all have thriving research labs with ongoing studies that need an ongoing stream of participants. The studies we’ve participated in have focused on infant and child development – things like social and emotional development and language acquisition.
What is it like to participate? In our experience, it has involved a child and parent pair visiting a research lab and completing a cognitive or behavioral assessment. The labs are very family-friendly (waiting rooms with lots of toys!) and the students have also been very friendly (and grateful for our participation). The whole experience usually takes about half an hour.
We start by filling out some demographic paperwork before moving onto the study itself, which usually takes no longer than 15 minutes. As an example, the latest study June participated in was investigating how young children understand and use the word “we,” so she was shown various groups of kids on a screen and asked questions about them. In the COVID era, we’ve even participated in studies via Zoom!
What else do I need to know? Most labs are looking for kids ages 6 months to 18 years, though individual studies will have narrower required age ranges. In our experience, the scheduling has been very flexible – they usually have slots from 9-6 or so, including Saturdays. We’ve been paid either a small gas allowance or something like a $10 Amazon gift card as a thank you, and the kids have gotten a “junior scientist” certificate and their choice of a small prize. June has always found it to be fun!
How can I participate? Shortly after our kids were born, we received information in the mail about joining the research registries of UNC and Duke, which is how we first got connected. Most of our studies have been through the Duke Child Studies Lab, so if you’re in the Triangle, you can learn more and sign up here! Otherwise, I’d Google the name of your nearest university and “child studies” or “research studies” and see what you can find!
Why bother? Great question! Research studies first came on my radar years ago when a dear friend, working in a research lab as a Yale graduate student, connected with my mom (a preschool director), to recruit kiddos for her lab’s studies. I remember her saying how tough it was to find people to participate, and thought it was neat that they could work together. When I heard about similar studies in our area, I remembered that conversation and liked the idea of being able to help.
In a larger sense, y’all know I love my parenting books – and my favoriteones are chock full of anecdotes and findings from studies just like the ones we’ve participated in. Our individual 15-minute bit might seem small in the grand scheme of things, but it’s part of building a better understanding of behavior and development. Just like democracy, it turns out we all have a role to play in the scientific process! :)
Also, though my kids have only a limited understanding of what they’re doing at the moment, I think these visits will be a neat vehicle to talk to them about research, science, college, our brains, careers, etc. as they get older.
I’d love to hear: have you ever participated in a research study? As the researcher or participant, by yourself or with your child? Have I inspired you to look into options in your area? :)
December tends to be a bit of a clean-up month around here, as I hustle to share in the same calendar year anything of note that hasn’t quite made it to the blog! As such, I’ll occasionally serve up posts that are a bit out of season – but we’ll just consider them inspiration for the seasons ahead :) In this spirit, today I’m sharing a few photos and stories from our eighth annual family camping trip with the Rays. Hold onto your boots – it was a cold and wet one!
For our eighth year, we returned to Blue Bear Mountain Camp, outside of Boone, North Carolina. As always, our car was absolutely stuffed.
This was our third trip to Blue Bear, and it never disappoints – it’s a lovely campsite, with friendly people, and decent bathroom facilities (ha!). Sadly, we had to postpone from our original weekend due to weather, and we did not get our top choice campsites upon rescheduling. The sites were actually pretty inconvenient, especially for families with small children – down a steep hill from the cars and bathrooms, and with a fairly steep (though wooded) drop-off on the other side. But we made the best of it!
We arrived on Friday afternoon in gray chill, which eventually progressed into mist (the photos of our site were all taken the next morning!). The grass was already wet from rain earlier in the day, which made hauling in our gear tricky and resulted in wet feet almost immediately. Thankfully, John and I were well equipped thanks to his excellent suggestion to wear our Bean boots, but for some reason we didn’t extend that logic to our kiddos, so they quickly were complaining of cold, wet feet – not pleasant, and I don’t blame them one bit! In fact, I felt terrible we didn’t think to bring their rain boots – total parent fail.
All was not lost, though! We had yummy beef stew for dinner that we warmed up over the camp stove, a crackling fire for s’mores, and a neat tarp covering rigged up by John and Will (that took advantage of our strange campsite!) to keep the rain off. And once everyone was in jams and dry socks in the tent, all was warm and cozy.
And the next morning, we woke up to glorious sun!! After breakfast around the campfire, we trundled off to Julian Price Memorial Park, just off the Blue Ridge Parkway, for our big hike of the weekend. Though VERY muddy at times, everyone seemed to enjoy it, and it afforded plenty of rock-throwing and snack-eating opportunities. We didn’t make it the full distance of our planned hike, but still called it a success since no one fell in the water or face-planted in the mud.
We tucked into our traditional dinner of hot dogs over the fire and all the fixings (including, of course, s’mores) that evening. Then it was a warm breakfast in the morning, packing up the campsites, and lots of hugs goodbye as we headed back to Raleigh. On the way, our family stopped in Blowing Rock for lunch (which I’d highly recommend – they have a really fun new playground in the center of town!).
Friends, you know I’m always going to shoot it to you straight when it comes to camping, and I have to say I think this was our family’s toughest year so far (I think last year holds that title for the Rays). Friday’s weather was dispiriting (our first-ever precipitation on a camping trip!), I did really feel bad about the kids’ wet feet situation, the mud and terrain of our specific campsites made it hard for the kids to roam freely back and forth, and we missed one night of campfire conversation due to grown-ups who were just too tired to stay up after the kids went to bed.
Am I glad we went? Of course! I never considered not going, and never once wished we were at home while we were away. The kids seemed to have a fantastic time. But, though there were many sweet moments to be had (building fairy houses! yummy food! good conversation! a beautiful hike!), 2020 will not go down in the books as my favorite camping trip of all time. Which, honestly, seems entirely on brand for 2020 :) And you know what? That’s okay – because it means we’re stacking this year up against some pretty amazing past experiences, and every year can’t be the absolute best.
With kids aged 5, 4, 3, 2, and 1 in tow (yes, really!), we are banking on the fact that it can pretty much only get easier from here. We’ll pray for better weather and our first choice of campsite in 2021! :)
P.S. If you want to hear more about our experiences camping with kids (and our best advice!), be sure to listen to my episode of the Work & Play podcast!
North Carolina gained an estimable new resident when my friend Madeline moved here last year. When she mentioned she was hoping to explore more of her adopted state in the coming months, I immediately volunteered my services as informal tour guide. We have gained much from her presence, and now it’s time for NC to give a little something back to her through new experiences, memories, stories, and delicious tastes!
John and I put our heads together and came up with this list of our absolute favorite North Carolina places, foods, sights, and experiences. It goes without saying, but even this lengthy list hardly scratches the surface of all the wonderful things the Old North State has to offer — but it’s a place to start! (And, it must be said, it’s Triangle-heavy, since that’s where we both reside.)
Though many of you live places other than North Carolina, I hope this serves as a helpful guide if you take a trip to our state! From the mountains to the sea, from barbecue to Laotian dim sum, it’s truly a wonderful place.
In no particular order and without further ado…
1. Attend a service at Duke Chapel. 2. While you’re there, stroll through Duke Gardens (we love to bring a picnic from nearby Foster’s Market). 3. And, if you can finagle it, watch a men’s basketball game in Cameron. 4. See an outdoor summer movie at the North Carolina Art Museum Art Park (go early to wander the grounds and see the outdoor art installations). 5. See an outdoor movie or concert at Koka Booth Ampitheatre. 6. Take the ferry to Bald Head Island for the day (or a week). Rent a bike and ride all over. 7. Stay at the European-feeling Old Edwards Inn in Highlands. 8. Swim in the Eno River (we prefer the Few’s Ford access, and like to pack a picnic from nearby Picnic!). 9. Eat a BLT at Merritt’s. 10. Plunge into the icy waters of Sliding Rock, a natural water slide on the Blue Ridge Parkway. 11. Catch the North Carolina Symphony Orchestra at an outdoor concert (often in September). 12. Order a chocolate souffle to-go from the Fearrington House Inn and eat it in the Adirondack chairs facing the cow pasture. 13. Visit the quaint coastal town of Beaufort — eat at Beaufort Grocery, see the wild ponies on Shackleford Banks, and stroll the charming streets. 14. Walk the beautiful neighborhoods of Raleigh: Oakwood, Mordecai, and – my personal favorite – Hayes Barton. 15. Cheer at a Durham Bulls game (best ballpark snacks you’ll ever have!). Park in the parking deck and walk through the beautiful American Tobacco Campus to get to the game. 16. Sip a farm-inspired beverage on the edge of the growing field at the Honeysuckle Tea House. 17. Hike a Southern bald. We’ve done Black Balsam Knob, and have our sights on Grassy Ridge. 18. Experience the magic that is Brewery Bhavana: flower shop, brewery, bookstore, and dim sum restaurant in one. 19. Experience the magic that is the NC State Fair: goats, biscuits, giant watermelons, and more. 20. Check off at least one of James Beard Outstanding Chef award winner Ashley Christensen’s restaurants. (You can’t go wrong with any of them, but we especially love Chuck’s and Death and Taxes. Okay, and Poole’s.) 21. Walk the paths of the WRAL Azalea Garden. It usually blooms right around Palm Sunday and Easter! 22. Climb the fire tower at Hanging Rock State Park. 23. Pick apples in the mountains (try Altapass or Justus Orchards). 24. See a show at DPAC, the Durham Performing Arts Center (it’s where we saw Hamilton!). 25. Get an ice cream sandwich at Parlour. 26. And a cone at Maple View, complete with view of the generous cows who provided the milk. 27. Visit the Saxapahaw General Store (get a BLT there, too!). 28. Eat at Vin Rouge, a French restaurant transplanted into Durham and a vanguard of the Triangle’s impressive restaurant scene. 29. Drive the NC peach trail, including a stop at Kalawi Farm Market for a basketful. 30. Feed the giraffes lettuce at the NC Zoo. 31. Grab a bagel sandwich at Benchwarmers in Transfer Co Food Hall. 32. Last but certainly not least, spend at least a weekend in Asheville. Drive the Blue Ridge Parkway, tour the Biltmore (it’s so worth it!), hike at Crabtree Falls, white water raft, and for the love of everything good, eat at White Duck Taco.
And now, a few things still on our bucket list: Jolie and Poole’side Pies, the Front Porch Artwalk in Mordecai, a Snap Pea adventure dinner, the Lost Colony performance in Manteo, Chef and the Farmer, Joyce Kilmer forest, the Oakwood Lantern Light tour, and the Fried Turkey Sandwich Shop :)
Now, friends, I know you’ve got them, so let’s hear your additions in the comments! What would be on your North Carolina bucket list?
I mean, if that doesn’t sound like an adventure, what does?! Truthfully, our seventh camping trip together almost did the Rays in, I think, but in the end, we’ve all agreed we’re going back next year :) Here’s a peek at our weekend away, if you’d like to see!
This year, we chose Lake James State Park for our home base. Our side-by-side tent sites were close to the wash house, which was perfect for our frequent visits! The park itself was perched up on a hill without any lake views, but it was a quick drive to the beach — which we took advantage of, as you’ll see below!
Sometimes we camp in the spring and sometimes in the fall; this year we chose August to give the December baby a chance to grow up a bit! We’ve each camped with a 9-month-old in our family, and know it can be a tough age (limited mobility=frustration). That, in addition, to coming in with a sleep deficit, pretty well summed up the challenges for the Rays.
Of course, there were a million delights along the way, too! Conversation around the campfire, “dance recitals” in the road next to our campsite, a beautiful hike, time in the water, yummy meals, and lots of sweet moments.
We ventured out to revisit an old favorite hike – Lower Catawba Falls – and though it was a beautiful day, we were a little disappointed: we were sharing the trail with so many others, it felt like we were at Disney World! It was a shocking change from our first visit to these falls 8 or so years ago, when we maybe saw three other hikers. Still beautiful, but I wouldn’t recommend it at this point if you’re looking for solitude. (It is, however, a mostly flat hike with a lovely payoff at the end, so it remains great for families.)
Since it was Labor Day weekend, it was also warm enough to enjoy Lake James itself, and we had a perfect day for it! It feels like the scene below could be from 1980 or 2019, doesn’t it?
There are many things I love about camping, but I’ll sum up this post with two of my favorites.
First, camping, in our lives, is the pinnacle of the slow pace of life I aim for, and particularly, the slow parenting. One of my favorite memories from this trip is the hour or more the kiddos spent digging in the gravel of our campsite. Literally just spoons and plastic cups and rocks, and they could have stayed there all day.
Our world is so often not set up for exercising a longer attention span or enjoying simple activities, but the world of camping is. I’m thankful for these trips, because they give me new ideas and a renewed desire to add this kind of space to our normal lives.
Second, I love how new locations and the time to sink into them allow us to get to know someone in a different way. I’ve alluded to this trip giving me new insight into Shep’s personality, and it’s true that I feel like I saw a whole new side of it. I had a conception of him as moody, often grumpy for no reason, and with a short attention span.
Camping showed me that he is perfectly content and perfectly able to sink into an activity for an extended period as long as he’s given freedom of movement and free access to materials. As a mama, one of my most important duties is to know the hearts and minds of my kiddos so I can speak into them and love them well, and I’m grateful for anything that gives me more insight. Sometimes, all it takes is a change of location for a fresh perspective.
Friends, thanks for graciously accepting this very un-Christmas-y post so close to Christmas, ha! As always, my hope in sharing these camping recaps (in addition to recording our memories!) is to encourage you to take YOUR family outside. If I can answer any questions or cheer you on as you consider it, it would be my delight. Our past archives might be helpful, too…
