Whew! After finally posting my 2021 goals, my blog comments up and quit on the same day!! If you had somanythoughts you were bursting to share but couldn’t, feel free to head over there now to do so, ha! I always LOVE hearing from y’all.
As I said in that post, this is where it gets good – these monthly posts where I break down my goals, take little steps forward on the things that matter to me, and hold myself accountable (with your help!). Even though we’re about halfway through the month, there’s still plenty of time of time to take action :)
A few housekeeping reminders here at the beginning of the year: if you’d like to get an email every time there’s a new EFM post, you can sign up for that here. If you’re ever searching for something I’ve mentioned loving in a past goals post, you can find it here. And if you’re looking for my Amazon shop (mostly favorite books and kid stuff!), you can find that here! Now, onto the goals…
On my calendar: — Celebrating our 16th dativersary! Hoping we can go out for dinner if we have a warm enough evening. — A hike with friends!
What I’m loving right now: — Received via the Coffee & Crumbs newsletter, this essay on “our shared unsharing” hit home for me. It reflects a lot of what I’ve felt in the last year about sharing (or not) on Instagram, and what I’ve noticed about trends on the platform. The author’s parallel experience of bringing her love for magazines and storytelling to IG also felt very familiar! Worth a read. — I’ve followed NieNie off and on since her accident 12+ years ago, but resubscribed to her blog a few months ago when I realized she now lives in the next town over! I have really loved watching the intentional way she shapes her family culture (and celebrates all the things). It’s so rare to find blogs featuring families that are out of the preschool/elementary years! — Gosh, Target has killed it with their Valentine’s Day collection yet again. This mailbox ($5!) will play a key role in our February plans, and I also picked up one of these pale pink melamine bowls for each member of our family. (And the heart plates!! So cute!) We’ll use them year-round. (Also, not Valentine’s Day related, but I snagged these seagull swim trunks for Shep in the same order. Again, so cute!)
What I read in December: — The Handmaid and the Carpenter | A short little book bringing Mary and Joseph’s story to life. Elizabeth Berg is a favorite author of mine and it was a treat to hear her take on this famous story! — The Great Alone | One of my favorites from the year! Though there is tragedy and darkness woven throughout, it’s an epic, engrossing tale that ends on a bright note. Love, love, love. — Time to Parent | I’m going to file this one under “good for her, not for me.” I agreed with most of her ideas about organizing our time and actions as parents, and there were some gems tucked in, but I’d say this book was a 101 level, and time organization is probably one of the things I’m better at in life. If you’re struggling to find time for all of your priorities as a parent, I think this would be a great read! — HRH: So Many Thoughts About Royal Style | I found her writing a little chatty (Can you imagine? Don’t you think?) but it’s a fun read (and totally got us back into The Crown!). — Make Something Good Today | I had the joy of reading Erin’s daily blog that inspired this book long before HGTV found her and Ben. Her writing was something special back then, and it shines here, too. I don’t think you need to care at all about their show to enjoy this book, though, of course, if you do, you’ll probably like it even more!
January goals: — Research all school options for June. We are pretty sure we know what we’re going with, but the Enneagram 5 in me needs to know everything has been considered, and there’s a registration deadline this month. EEK! — Watch the Theolaby bonus materials with John. We bought the box set as part of the kids’ Christmas presents, and it came with some videos from Jennie and friends! — Print our favorite Instagram photos from 2020 — Finish culling and sorting 2020 photos — Write our sweet girl a note for her fifth birthday (continuing a tradition) — Complete her birthday interview — Prep for Valentine’s Day fun — Focus on small tweaks and refreshes in our foyer, including a new light fixture
As a reminder, many of these are drawn from my 2021 goals!
I’d love to hear: how do you celebrate Valentine’s Day? Any fun ideas to share? Did anything resonate with you from the shared unsharing piece? :)
This is by far the latest I’ve ever published a yearly goals post.
It’s funny – a few years ago, I felt pressure to post my goals on January 1, on the dot, as if no one would be interested in them on the 2nd. Thankfully, I no longer feel that way (and I know that, wonderful people you are, you’re still interested in what I have to share, even a few days later than you expect!).
As always, I’ve been faithfully engaged in the process of reviewing, evaluating, and dreaming with the help of my PowerSheets. I feel quite clear about the year ahead, but when it came time to write my actual goals and share them with you, I stalled. They felt disjointed, and overly complicated.
That hit me hard, because I loved my 2020 goals. Though I certainly had to pivot on my execution as the year progressed, I was passionate about each one, loved how they moved me forward in the big picture, and pleased with how they turned out. It turns out 2020 goals are a tough act to follow, for me!
After stewing and complaining to John all last week (and then getting derailed again by my anger and sadness over Wednesday’s events), I sat down this weekend determined. I rewrote and laid things out as plainly as possible. And I remembered what we always tell people at Cultivate, which apparently I needed to be reminded of, too: you’re allowed to change course throughout the year. Your goals don’t have to be perfect. What matters is forward movement in the right direction.
I do believe these goals are moving me in the right direction, and I’m grateful to share them with you today – because sharing here is one of the key factors in the progress I’ve made on the things that matter so much to me, year after year. As always, thank you for being here, friends!
1. Make room for God’s presence by reading the Bible. I have a two-part faith goal this year, inspired by a sermon I listened to in December. In it, Darren outlined three ways to cultivate defiant joy as a Christian, inspired by Philippians 4:4-8 (because, as he said, the only people experiencing joy in this season are those cultivating defiant joy). They are: give thanks, because gratitude uncovers joy; make room for God’s presence through time in the Word, prayer, and worship; and set joy before you (by focusing on what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy).
When I am regularly in the Word, I am abiding in Him and better able to exhibit the fruits of the spirit as a wife, mom, friend, family member, neighbor, writer, etc. For this goal, I’ve started with a simple commitment to “Word before words,” or reading my Bible each night before I pick up my current fiction or non-fiction read. Excited to dig into and apply Women of the Word in Q1, too!
2. Set joy before us. This is part two! There are so (SO) many things vying for our attention these days, and I want to thoughtfully direct my eyes, heart, and effort to what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. I’m starting by printing out the above to post on our fridge as a reminder. Though this goal might look like removing some things from my life (The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry has some great thoughts on this), I am most excited to add lovely and excellent FUN in, possibly including hosting the meal planning potluck I dreamed up last year (sometime in 2021??), baking something with June every week from her new cookbook (we’re three weeks strong so far!), holiday fun (excited about my plan for Valentine’s Day), and adventures big and small.
3. Do those things we’ve always wanted to do for our home. After some ambivalence, we are at a place where we feel settled in this home for the next few years at least. If there are upgrades or changes we’d like to make, I’d like to do them now, when we can enjoy them, rather than in a rush before putting the house on the market for someone else to enjoy! Y’all know I am the world’s SLOWEST decision maker and shaker when it comes to our home, and in many cases, I’ve known for YEARS the changes I’d like to make. This year, I’d like to do those things. For most rooms, it’s not much!
4.Refresh our home. After 8 years of life with the Thomas family (including welcoming two kids!), our home is showing some wear and tear. There are lots of small, boring projects (paint touch-ups, Magic Eraser work, carpet cleaning, stain removal, caulk repairs, etc.) that would make our space sparkle like the day we bought it. In tandem with goal no. 3, we’ll go room-by-room to address any little refreshes that will help our home look and feel loved. This might be the most boring goal I’ve ever set in my life, buuuuuut… I hope it will be satisfying? Ha!
5. Build our family culture as we transition to an elementary-school family.Told you a version of this goal would be on most lists for the foreseeable future! :) This is my catch-all goal to remind myself to focus on small ways to love my family well, intentionally nurture the character traits that are important to us, and make our home the most joyful, loving place to be. This year, I expect to focus on rhythms and routines throughout the year as we adjust to having a kindergartner, including having fun with our kiddo and grown-up dates; connecting more regularly with faraway family; possibly implementing a family economy for June; and finding new ways to teach our kids about God.
6. Prioritize memory keeping. This is a bit of a carry-over goal from 2020, as I made great progress on our Advent calendar and family albums last year. Setting this goal will help me prioritize finishing the calendar, completing our second and third albums, and keeping up the rhythms of things like yearly videos and photo organization. We also plan to do a few family photo sessions this year, and we all know those take considerable effort to orchestrate!
7. Encourage each other to grow strong through cycling, strength workouts, and stretching. Something that became very clear last year is that in terms of exercise, John and I do best when we feed off each other’s energy (unlike our Bible reading goal, which is a better individual pursuit for us). The foundation of cycling, strength workouts, and stretching we set last year has been so fun to pursue together, and I’m excited to keep it up in 2021. Knowing it will look different at different points in the year, I’ll be setting monthly goals to follow through!
8. Make a book of the first 10 years of EFM. While I place tremendous value on sharing here with friends near and far (and LOVE hearing from you when a post touches you – truly, one of my favorite things!), I have long thought of this place as a repository of stories, memories, and wisdom for my children. I’d like to create a physical book for them of the best posts from the first ten years of my writing here (I’m in year 13 now!).
Whew!! With these out in the world, I feel like I can finally move into 2021 now, ha! As I struggled an unusual amount with my goals this year, talking with dear goal-setting friends and reading others’ thoughtful posts was so helpful and encouraging to me. If you are a goal setter, I can’t recommend surrounding yourself with a likeminded community enough, especially one that shares regular updates! A few of my favorites and their 2021 goals: Lisa, Rhi, Lara, Nancy, Val, Shay, Jen, and Janssen. (Have another goal setter whose blog you love to follow? I’d love to hear about her!)
I’ll be back with my January goals post tomorrow, but in the meantime, I’d love to hear what you have planned for 2021. Have you set goals yet? I’d truly love to hear, so please drop a note in the comments! I can’t wait to cheer you on.
P.S. Still working on my vision board for the year – stay tuned!
Last year, for the first time, I pre-planned 24 books to read throughout the year – one fiction and one non-fiction each month – for my own personal book club. I was very skeptical about the whole idea (would I hate being constrained? would I lose interest a few months in?), but I agreed – with myself – to hold the plan with loose hands.
Turns out, I loved everything about this project – turns out, it was one of my favorite things about 2020! I did, indeed, hold the plan loosely, especially when libraries closed for several months, and ended up reading 17 of my planned 24 books. Because of it, I was much more thoughtful about the mix of books I read – dipping into a wider variety of authors, subjects, depths, and modes than I would have had I just been at the whim of my library requested-books queue.
That’s what most excites me for my 2021 list. I have spent much time (kind of an embarrassing amount of time, actually) finalizing it. In the process, I referenced trusted friends (many of whom you’ll see sprinkled throughout this post), considered the events of my year, and mined my own extensive TBR iPhone note. I’m excited to read each one of these books, and if you’d like me to join me for any of them, I’d love to have you! Like last year, I’m planning to share a few brief thoughts on Instagram along the way, as well as in my monthly goal posts.
Many of these picks line up with my 2021 goals, which I’ve finalized and am planning to share later this week! Without further ado…
January: Such a Fun Age | This is by far the number one recommended book that I have not yet read, so I thought I’d give the people what they want and start the year off with it :) Essentialism | Will be reading with my work gals! I’ve learned that before bed (my usual reading time) is not the best for a work-related book, since it turns my thoughts to work things and makes it hard to fall asleep, so I’m excited to dip into this one while I eat lunch, perhaps? “Essentialism isn’t about getting more done in less time. It’s about getting only the right things done.”
February: Crazy Rich Asians | We watched and loved the movie, and I’ve heard the book that inspired it is even better! A love story seemed appropriate for the month of love :) Upstairs at the White House | Considering it’s both an inauguration year and February is when we celebrate Presidents Day, this book about family life at the White House, told by the chief usher from FDR’s presidency through the first few weeks of Nixon’s, seemed appropriate! I’ll be reading along with Janssen’s book club.
March: Homegoing | This one has been on my radar since Jen wrote about it in 2019, and then of course it exploded in popularity midway through 2020. Excited to experience it for myself! I’ll be reading along with Stephanie Shaul’s book club, for which I faithfully read the email communication each month but have never actually attended, ha! Women of the Word: How to Study the Bible with Both Our Hearts and Our Minds | “How can we, as Christian women, keep our focus and sustain our passion when reading the Bible? This book will equip you to engage God’s word in a way that trains your mind and transforms your heart.” As someone who missed out on learning practical tools to engage in my faith when younger, I read this description and yelped, “sign me up!”
April: Olive Kitteridge | I’m intrigued and a bit nervous about this Pulitzer Prize winner. Jo says it’s her favorite book, but the reviews are decidedly mixed, with some readers saying it’s boring and depressing. We shall see :) Atomic Habits | I mean, can you even work for a company that helps women set goals and NOT have read this book?! Excited to see what all the fuss is about. I’ll be reading with Nancy’s book club!
May: The Vanishing Half| Maybe the most popular book of 2020, according to social media. Tracing the paths of two sisters as it does, I’m intrigued to compare it to Homegoing! Being Mortal | This one has been on my TBR list for years, and when it popped up on Janssen’s plan, I knew it was time to get it on my nightstand. As Christians, we are reminded to number our days, and this sounds like a book that can help me do that.
June: Dear Edward | One 12-year-old survives a plane crash that kills the other 183 passengers – and sets off a “multidimensional portrait of an unforgettable cast of characters.” Self Portrait in Black and White | Fun fact about John: you know how we talked about patrons awhile ago? One way he shows his patronage of voices he appreciates is by buying their books. However, he *very* rarely actually reads them – more often, I pick them up after they’ve gathered dust for a few months on his bedside table, and then read choice passages out loud to him before bed, haha. Such is the story of this month’s pick :)
July: American Royals | A lighthearted romantic comedy that would surely cause the Founding Fathers to roll in their graves. Cheekily reading this in the month of our nation’s birth. The Gospel Comes with a House Key | Reading with Nancy’s book club! Loved this from the jacket: “Such hospitality sees our homes as not our own, but as God’s tools for the furtherance of his kingdom as we welcome those who look, think, believe, and act differently from us into our everyday, sometimes messy lives―helping them see what true Christian faith really looks like.”
August: A Column of Fire | The next book in the Kingsbridge series, which I dearly love! The Self-Driven Child | Just read the description of this book and you’ll immediately see why I am very excited about it. I love the idea of diving into a book about parenting in the month we’ll be sending our oldest to kindergarten!
September: Nobody Will Tell You This But Me | This one’s for my friend Pressley, whose recommendations always perk up my ears. Also, four generations of family stories sound right up my alley. Awaking Wonder | Continuing with the previous month’s theme, this is Sally Clarkson’s take on education in its most holistic form. As I love The Lifegiving Home, I’m excited to learn from her once again.
October: The Dutch House | Even though I already own a copy of this, it’s the only book I’m considering listening to – I’ve heard the Tom Hanks narration is perfection! Beautiful Resistance | Jon Tyson speaks right to my heart, soul, and mind whenever he delivers a message on living within (but not of) today’s culture. This one has been sitting on John’s bedside table, too, ha!
November: The Dearly Beloved | If it’s one of Stephanie’s top 5 books of the year, it’s going on my list! The plot, which weaves together two marriages, across several decades, tied together by the church they steward, promises to be rich and satisfying. Funny in Farsi | This memoir about an Iranian immigrant family sounds delightful and, well, funny. And it has Janssen’s seal of approval!
December: The Book of Longings | I am skeptical about this book, but several friends have raved about it and reading The Invention of Wings last year reminded me how much I love Sue Monk Kidd’s writing – so here we are! Digital Minimalism | The only book I didn’t read from my 2020 list that’s making it onto this year’s list. Helps that I already own it :)
I’d love to hear: have you read any of these books? Would you like to read any alongside me in 2021? Let’s chat!
