On my birthday, I wrote about my spirit age, or subjective age, of 36 – the age I’ve consistently felt on the inside since my late teens. Dancing around the edge of those musings was something else I’ve been sitting with, though it didn’t make it into the essay proper: the idea that I don’t change. This is less of a settled fact I believe about myself and more an idea I’m holding up to the light, twisting and turning to see how it looks from different angles. Does it square when held up against other things I know to be true about myself?
The answer: yes and no. Yes, I think I am an unusually consistent person, and have been for a long time. I value stability and loyalty and wisdom. I married my high school sweetheart. I have worked for the same company my whole adult life (albeit with twists and turns along the way). I made a major geographical move after college but have stayed put ever since. My faith has remained true. This blog you’re reading has been around for 14 years.
But also: I used to fear and loathe speaking in front of a crowd, and now I volunteer for it. We worship in a new community. I am hugely more comfortable with small talk, and now rather likely to extend forward invitations in friendship. I compost and use washable cotton rounds and somehow learned to use my Instant Pot. I camp and hike. I read things I disagree with daily, and sometimes they change my mind.
Let’s consider this a little home tour preview, shall we? :)
Change and novelty do not always come naturally to me, but I see their value. And so, in my 36th year, I am – very loosely, very casually – embarking on a “new 36” experiment. (“New 52” has much more of a ring to it, but 52 felt a bit overwhelming :)) The plan is to seek out the new that feels like it would add something to my life. I’m thinking of it more as a “to done” list than a “to do” list, with more room for serendipity than some of my other projects.
That being said, I do have a few ideas – some of which I’ve already checked off or that are in process…
Take tennis lessons Place an order on ThredUp Pray on my knees first thing in the morning Volunteer with Habitat for Humanity Donate blood (I come from a family of prodigious blood donors and have grand aspirations but have always been near the weight limit and somewhat prone to fainting…) Find a perfume I love Replace my beloved hat with a new look Camp for the weekend with my best big girl Chaperone a field trip Take a day trip via train to Greensboro Bike the whole American Tobacco Trail
What would be on your list? What new thing would you like to do or try? This experiment was inspired in part by my friend Shay, who shared about her “new 52” project in her 38th year. Some things she’s tried so far: throwing pottery, a new discipleship friendship, visiting a new country (!), a hot yoga class, a personal training session, a new marriage devotional, and attending a hockey game.
I also floated my idea to the Articles Club gals and they had ideas of their own. New things my pals want to try: install a Little Free Library, learn to use power tools, donate a kidney (!), play pickle ball with friends, and plant herbs.
So: what would be on your list? Or what new thing, big or small, have you tried in the last year? I’d love to hear!
Remember in December when we talked about my two marvelous friends and their done-for-you holiday magic? Persnickety Gifts sources stocking stuffers, Easter baskets, birthday gifts, and more so that you can celebrate as a family with ease. If you love the idea of shopping small, curating thoughtful gifts, and creating everyday magic for your littles, but don’t have the patience, know-how, bandwidth, and/or desire to make it happen, this is for you!
Just like their stockings, their done-for-you Easter baskets couldn’t be easier: you choose your child’s age and gender on their website, and they send you a neatly-packaged bundle of goodies ready to tuck into their basket. No paying shipping from 15 retailers or breaking down 15 boxes – just handpicked delights from small and lovable businesses. (And no weird surprises, either – you can see everything that will be included right in the listing!)
So fun, yes? And lucky for us, Persnickety was kind enough to let me give away one done-for-you basket bundle! Just leave a comment here with which basket bundle you’d choose (age + gender – though of course they’re just suggestions – you know your kids best!). Consider following Persnickety on Instagram or signing up for their newsletter for a little holiday magic throughout the year, if you’d like.
I’ll choose a winner on Wednesday! (Updated to add: Congratulations to our winner, Carolyn!)
In addition to inviting me to host a giveaway, my pals were kind enough to send me a few items from their add-on collection. And friends, don’t sleep on this under-the-radar part of their business! It’s perfect for someone like me – who enjoys collecting things throughout the year and likes to include basics like shoes and pajamas, but loves the opportunity to round out what I’ve collected with fun items from small businesses (again without paying shipping multiple times or breaking down boxes).
Here’s what each of our kids will be getting in their Easter baskets this year, including goodies from Persnickety Gifts:
We’re in Lent, the season in the Christian calendar that leads to Easter. It’s often a time when Christians will either fast from something or add a spiritual discipline to their days, with the intent of orienting their minds and hearts more toward Jesus. Lent seems as good a time as any to debut this series, though I anticipate it will stretch for years into the future, as our kids grow and the way we seek to form our family and its faith grows alongside them.
An admission up front: there will likely be no groundbreaking ideas here. You might find these posts almost at the level of duh simplicity. But if you’re anything like me, you need the regular and very simple reminder that family discipleship does not always have to be complicated. More than perhaps any other area of my life, I have the instinct here to build the big machine, to devise the elaborate practice – and still, more often than not, to worry that I’m not doing enough.
This is not all bad: I believe there is a direct relationship between how much creating a fertile environment for our children to know and trust Jesus matters to me (and John) and how much thought we put into how we are doing that. But I hope through this occasional series I can encourage you (if it’s something that matters to you) AND MYSELF that little by little adds up.
So without further ado, here are the first three (very simple) family faith formation practices that we’ve been practicing with our 7-year-old, 4-year-old, and 1-year-old.
We go to church.
Aside from a too-long hiatus during the pandemic, going to church every Sunday has been a priority for our family. This essay does a much better job than I could at outlining the power of this simple habit, but as a parent, I especially appreciated how he shared that his family’s commitment to attending church every Sunday growing up communicated major truths to him that embedded deeply: God is the center of life. God is worthy of praise and worship. The Christian life requires sacrifice and discipline. As in so many areas of life, actions (especially consistent actions) speak louder than words.
“If you feel inadequate to lead your kids spiritually,” he writes, “just go to church. If strategizing about your Christian parenting feels overly complicated, just go to church.” When I tell you I feel seen…
Of course, it’s not quite this simple. Faithfully going to church, week after week, means opening yourself to the influence of others. It specifically means releasing your children into spaces where they’ll be taught by others in a situation beyond your control. (And man, as parents we like control, don’t we?) It means entering into community and being known. It requires trust. I know this can feel scary, and it is certainly worth your time to search for and vet a potential church home. But I also personally feel convicted that for us, we could not let fear or apathy keep us from one of the most central parts of the Christian faith – gathering and worshiping regularly with other believers. And, speaking from the other side of having found a church home that fits and is trustworthy, it is more than worth the effort of the search and moving past the fear.
We listen to our kids’ worship playlist.
Credit for this one goes to Nancy! I started our playlist by cribbing songs from hers, but have slowly made it our own over the last few years. It includes worship songs meant for both kids and grown-ups. And while I choose the songs with my kids in mind, the rule is that every song must be one the grown-ups also enjoy listening to – no annoying songs here :) It includes mostly-upbeat and sing-along-able favorites from Ellie Holcomb, Slugs and Bugs, Rend Collective, Lifetree Kids, Mission House, Lauren Daigle, Maverick City, We the Kingdom, and more.
This is our default playlist in the car, but I particularly like to play it on our way to and from school – I think it’s a beautiful way to fill their hearts before they head to the classroom, as well as welcome them back home into our family in the afternoon. I knew my plan was succeeding when June climbed in the car after school one day early on and said, “Mama, I had Leaning on the Everlasting Arms stuck in my head all day!” Ha! I also see these songs as building a vocabulary that helps them speak about their faith. (Many of the lyrics are actually scripture verses.)
One fun tip your kids might enjoy like ours did: when you make the playlist, name it after your family – ours is called Thomas Kids Worship.
We encourage ourselves.
John and I both take our jobs of shaping our kids hearts seriously, and so we’re serious about learning ways to do that better and seeking out resources that will encourage and equip us as we do. This looks different for each of us. I like to listen to podcasts like Risen Motherhood, the Family Discipleship Podcast, and Raising Boys and Girls. I also like to read – both books that are explicitly about shepherding kids, or simply ones that encourage and equip me in my own faith (which of course overflows to my kids).
Sometimes I’ll learn something tactical to apply, other times I take away a more philosophical idea that makes me think, and sometimes I’m simply receiving plain old encouragement to stick with it for the long haul. As an example, a very simple encouragement that has stuck with me from the Family Discipleship Podcast is this: when it comes to faith, our kids don’t have to understand everything all at once. In fact, much of the early work of faith formation is simply giving them a vocabulary to speak about and ask questions about faith. I knew that, of course (duh!), but when the hosts shared it, it was like a bucket of relief was poured over my head.
So there you have it! Three (relatively) simple faith formation practices our family has found helpful. I hope there’s something you can take away, whether fostering your kids’ faith also matters to you or if there’s something else you hope to grow in your kids (or the kids you love). If you’d like to share, I’d love to hear a practice that has been helpful in your family, or something that has stuck with you from your own upbringing!
The daffodils are blooming in our backyard and the weather has been delightful these past few weeks. There are a few in water on our kitchen table right now – a gift. And another: your birthday well wishes. They were so thoughtful and kind, and one of the best parts of my day. Thank you, thank you. Onward to 36! :)
On my calendar this month: — My favorite kids consignment sale! I’ll be volunteering on Friday morning, so come say hi if you see me :) — The Survivor 44 premier! The Ted Lasso season 3 premier! Lots of good TV to look forward to this month. — Easter basket shopping with all three kids. I’ll go on individual mini shopping trips to Target with each kiddo to choose items for baskets we donate through a local program. One of my favorite traditions! There’s more in this highlight.
What I’m loving right now: — These Souper Cubes sat in my house for over a year before I tried them (long story), but wow am I glad I did! They definitely qualify as something you don’t think you need, but that end up making life just a smidge better. It is SO much easier to freeze and thaw manageable portions of soups without dealing with the mess of ladling liquid into a plastic bag or squeezing it out of one. (We’ve also successfully frozen and thawed mac and cheese and rice dishes.) — I enjoyed this piece from AHP on archiving the teen self. Lots to chew and reminisce on! — Brooke Ligertwood’s new live album, Seven, has been on repeat over here. Perfect background music while prepping dinner :)
As a reminder, you can find allll the things I’ve loved over the last few years neatly organized right here!
What I read in February: — Deep Work | Though the author’s writing was a little supercilious, I took several practical ideas away from this book – most notably, grand gestures and timed internet breaks during the day. He also expounds on the virtues of time blocking, which you know I love! — The Maid | Though some of you pushed back on my calling this book “delightful” in this year’s reading list, I’m going to gently push back again, because I really do think delightful fits, ha! Or at least, I was delighted by it. Yes, it’s a thriller, but it’s not scary or stressful – just a really good story with a memorable narrator, endearing characters, and a heartwarming resolution. I loved it.
Starting out strong with my reading list for 2023! Here it is, if you’d like to follow along.
Revisiting my February goals: Finish culling and sorting 2021 photos (I made progress!!! This goal has been on my list for months (IYKYK), so completing January through June feels like a huge win – even if it shouldn’t, ha!) Print our favorite Instagram photos from 2022 Tackle our upstairs hall closet (Yes! See the transformation here. Do you like seeing the process on a Reel? Even if I don’t share it, it’s always motivating to film a time-lapse! :)) Sell or clear out the remaining items from our kitchen refresh (Done! Gifted them all on our neighborhood Buy Nothing group.) Share some thoughts here around my birthday (Yes! This post took a bit of a turn from what I had expected, but I’m happy with it.)
March goals: — Cull and sort second half of 2021 photos — Paint our master bathroom cabinets (I’m thinking green!) — Tackle the coat closet — Meet with a lawyer to update our estate planning documents — Make a style guide for the EFM book (basically, a sample page to decide on layout, fonts, text treatment, etc. and get familiar with the Blurb software) — Capture photos of our kitchen and bedroom to share updates – finally!! My sweet friend (and reader!) Anna is coming by to take photos and I am so grateful.
As a reminder, many of these are drawn from my 2023 goals!
