I am aware that we are in the sweetest of sweet spots in our family’s life. It’s rather unfashionable to say so – the more correct thing to say is that there is beauty in every season, and that we shouldn’t elevate one over another – but sometimes unfashionable things are also true. Of course (of course!) there is beauty in every season: I fully expect to delight in our family when everyone has graduated from elementary school, when we have teens, and when kids are home on college break. I will relish the days when we can all huddle around the same game board and no one is whining to be carried on a hike.
And yet: so many people say that the years between six and twelve are the golden ones for family life, and I can see why. Our kids are squarely within our sphere of influence. They like our home the best and spending time together the most. They don’t have phones or computers – there’s no algorithm shaping, splintering, spoiling their psyches. They’re growing more capable every day and look out for each other while on the go. They’re full of questions and eager for answers, willing accomplices, sweet and genuine and unguarded. They smile and hug and snuggle and hold our hands.
They also bicker, and vehemently express outsize opinions about inconsequential things. They complain and whine and dawdle and melt down. I lose my patience and come down hard in the wrong places and make the more expedient choice instead of the one I know is better in the long-term.
This is family life, with all of its joys and furies. This is our life together, and here I am to mark one more year in its span: to pin it down in my memory, to examine it from each side like the jewel-tone butterfly it is. Thank you, as always, for indulging me. xo
As ever, our year began by celebrating another birthday for our big girl – this time with a “birthday day of fun” with one of her best friends. We went to the Life & Science Museum in the morning, a rock climbing gym in the afternoon, and rounded out the day with her first ever sleepover. We invited a contractor into our attic to talk about renovation possibilities, cousins came to visit, I re-sorted my bookshelf after almost a decade of rainbow order, and Shep played his first basketball season at a gym in our neighborhood – bliss! We also kicked off reading Little Pilgrim’s Progress in the mornings before school, something we’d continue all year until we finished in December. Finally, my beloved paternal grandmother passed away on the 19th anniversary of John’s and my first date – and my maternal grandparents’ wedding anniversary.
We wished for snow in February but were disappointed. Instead, we made classroom valentines, hiked on sunny days, made crayon sun catchers (still hanging many months later!), and cheered on the NC State gymnastics team with friends. We spent a long weekend in Virginia with grandparents and cousins and took our first visit to the National Zoo. I celebrated my birthday at the end of the month with antiques shopping and a solo lunch date, and on the blog, I shared some thoughts on beauty at age 37 and 6 small changes I’m glad I made.
We spent lots of time outdoors in March, including on the field and sidelines for another soccer season for June and Shep. We celebrated the first blooms from our fancy daffodils, shopped for Easter baskets for kids in our community, and *almost* put in an offer on a home in our neighborhood after a 24-hour scramble to get pre-approved for a mortgage. We flew to Connecticut to honor my grandmother’s life at her memorial service – I gave a eulogy based on these remembrances – and loved getting to visit with family at our farm. A week later we left for another spring break on Jekyll Island, this time in the turret and with friends! On the blog, I shared a second installment of our family’s faith formation practices.
April was filled with adventures big and small. We biked to church one morning – 9 miles round trip! – I chaperoned a field trip for June, and Shep took some tune-up swim lessons before his first season of neighborhood swim team. Perhaps most notably, I flew to Texas for DG’s annual retreat and met Cultivate’s new vice president, Jessica. It’s been a year of much change for CWM and this was the week it all kicked off. I left feeling hopeful, and though it’s been a year of ups and downs, I’m grateful for our small but mighty team. On the blog, I shared an update on our mortgage payoff plan.
We kicked off May with two back-to-back weekends of camping with friends, and then John and June one-upped us by camping a third weekend during their 22-mile backpacking trip! June, John, and I were all terribly proud of how well she did on this epic adventure with dad. In between, we picked strawberries, biked all over our town, finished soccer, and started neighborhood swim team. Shep graduated from our beloved preschool and grandparents came to town to celebrate. I also organized a flower bar at church for Mother’s Day, a sweet opportunity to serve some ladies I love.
In June, the two bigs finally cashed in on their Christmas IOU – tickets to The Lion King at DPAC! Their faces absolutely lit up when the cast sang and danced their way down the aisle inches from our seats. School let out for the summer and we adjusted to the work-from-home life with two kids around. Verdict: incredibly grateful to be able to do it, not without its frustrations. We rounded the month out with more cousin visits, a sweaty Durham Bulls game, hosting a neighborhood kindergarten breakfast, first swim meets, and one of our favorite weekends of the year: a trip to a North Carolina beach town over Father’s Day/Juneteenth. And in the midst of it all (how?!), I traveled back to Texas for Cultivate’s big PowerSheets photo shoot.
In July we were off to Michigan, one of our happiest of happy places! We tubed, hiked, fished, dined, and napped in the sun with 35 Thomas family members. Soon enough it was time to send June off for her first summer of sleepaway camp – two weeks in the North Carolina mountains! After a flurrying of planning and packing, we walked away from a big piece of our heart with a lump in our throats. Thanks be to God she thrived (even if she did only send us one letter, ha!). On the blog, I shared a mid-year update on my goals.
Sleepaway camp flowed right into another week of Cousin Camp – with an Olympics theme, naturally. We continued the cousin time with a week together in Maine. It was a treasure, as always, despite the fact that John was knocked out by COVID for almost the entirety of our stay. An especially dear memory is taking the Whaler to a tiny nearby island one afternoon with just my dad and the three kids.
Back at home, we celebrated Shep’s birthday with his own birthday day of fun – a train ride to Greensboro to visit the children’s museum with two buddies and their sibs. And soon enough it was back to school for all three, but this time both June and Shep were biking to elementary school!
On the blog, I shared a simple trick that makes the most of my clothing budget.
September: more soccer (this time, for Annie, as well!), our annual camping trip with the Rays (this time on Lake Gaston!), and a 12th anniversary trip to Asheville where we dined and dreamed. Just a week later, we helplessly watched as damage from Hurricane Helene mounted across Western North Carolina. Closer to home, I pushed through considerable nerves to speak for the first time on behalf of The Connected Family. It was a gracious group (including some EFM reader friends! Hi!!), and I’m looking forward to doing more of it in 2025. On the blog, I finally shared my apple cider scone recipe and an anniversary sort-of poem.
After much heartache over the fate of our fall mountains trip (the area we had planned to visit was too damaged to receive travelers), we rerouted to Bryson City in October. We were grateful to be there and gratefully received by shopkeepers and restaurants eager for tourists. We gathered for the 9th anniversary of Articles Club, visited the state fair, cheered on our favorite babysitter at the Homecoming game, celebrated Lara and Ari’s vow renewal, and I saw Kendra Adachi (the Lazy Genius!) speak at Quail Ridge.
November was a quiet month. We mostly stayed home, welcoming my family for an early Thanksgiving weekend and celebrating Nancy’s new baby with a nesting party (an absolutely brilliant idea – more about that soon!). I began painting this year’s book ornaments and we ended the month in Virginia with all of John’s family for Thanksgiving proper.
December was full of delights old – baking favorite recipes, reading beloved books – and new – most notably, attending a performance of Handel’s Messiah with dear girlfriends. As a family, we unfortunately battled sickness all month, but it didn’t stop us from enjoying Christmas at home and a few days in Blowing Rock with my family immediately afterward (including snow tubing for the first time for all three kids!).
For us, each year in the life of our young family is a delicate balance – between travel and staying home, between “new” and “the same,” between pushing and choosing rest, between work and play, between freedom and control. We do not get it right all the time, not by a long shot – but we try. We think deeply about it, and pray for wisdom, and act carefully, and adjust as we go. It’s both rewarding and overwhelming to see a year in our life summed up like this, but as always, I’m choosing gratitude. It’s not hard, and for that I am, well, grateful.
Friends, however often I can show up here, I am so grateful for what we’ll discuss in 2025. Thank you for always meeting me here, and for sharing so generously with me! It’s one of the delights of my life. Wishing you a healthy, happy, and abundant new year. I’m finishing up my 2025 goals and reading list and can’t wait to share, so I’ll see you soon! :)
By popular request, I’m transposing the conceit of my gift guide for kids to this one – gifts for the people you love – by sharing what I’m actually gifting to a few of the loveliest people in my life this Christmas. Plus, I’ve included a few notes on gifts that have landed well in the past, in the hopes that one might be the right for your husband, mom, dad, sister, in-law, or beloved teacher.
(And on that note, if you are any of those people, close out this post pronto. Please and thank you :))
In the past, I’ve gifted experiences (Jim Gaffigan, Nate Bargatze, a treetop adventure course), this chair that folds up tiny, LOTS of clothing (this, this, this, this, this, and this most recently), a tumbler, a Durham Bulls shirt, a NYT crossword puzzle book, a Soda Stream (still used daily four years later), a weather station, and a very suave briefcase. (The briefcase linked is not exactly the same, but as close as I could find from the same brand – I bought John’s in 2018. It’s been used daily and still looks handsome!)
In the last few years he’s also bought himself a ruck carrier and plate, a down coat with hood, a fleece jacket and hat (both seen above), and some Ugg boots – after lusting after my warm toes for years. And don’t forget this post on some of John’s clothing favorites – lots of good ideas in there! One to highlight: the Legends sweater shirt, which is still his favorite thing to wear. Looks like a flannel, is as incredibly soft and stretchy as the best sweatshirt.
Oh yes, and don’t forget books: though John doesn’t read a ton of them himself (he’s more of an articles guy), he loves to support his favorite authors and thinkers by adding their offerings to the collection on his nightstand :) A few new additions this year: Fighting Shadows, The Divine Conspiracy, The Anxious Generation, and How to Know a Person.
My Dad will get a continuation of the Atlantic subscription I started for him a few years ago, and whose articles we enjoy discussing together – though I’m intrigued by this grill prep and carry set that is being gifted by several members of Articles Club this year.
For his Dad, John chose a gift basket of food goodies from Asheville. It’s a little more than the limit (see below), but it’s in support of our beloved mountains, so we’ll just consider the overage a donation :)
On John’s side of the family, the siblings and parents draw names — everyone gifts to one other person with a $100 limit. I drew my mother-in-law and chose for her a weighted vest (I got the 6 lb version!), a stick-on bird feeder, and the cutest seed birdhouse from a local garden store (above!).
On my side of the family, the siblings and husbands have opted to splurge on a fancy dinner out, together, in lieu of gifts over the last few years – and this year, too. However, my younger sister Kim will be joining us for Christmas morning this year, and per my desire to leave no one out of the gifting, I’m planning to wrap up a few small things for her: a set of 2025 PowerSheets (perk of the job!), a caramel tasting set from Trader Joe’s, a watercolor workbook, and a Ghiradelli’s brownie mix paired with a little bottle of blood orange olive oil. (You swap the flavored olive oil for the canola oil called for in the recipe – so delicious!!)
My Mom is going to get this Blackwatch pullover from my own wish list – she likes most of what I like and as a diehard New Englander, loves an L.L. Bean gift :)
All of the kids’ teachers will be getting a gift card to a local business, matched to their interests, and a very grateful note.
A few other gifts we’ve given in the past for your consideration:
— Chappy Wraps | Light yet cozy with the prettiest patterns. This is the go-to blanket on our sofa and we’ve gifted one to my parents, too!
— Original Bogg Bag | We use ours at the pool, the beach, and the soccer field, but I think they’re particularly helpful for road trip packing.
— Snap tote | They fold up flat and snap open to fit a ton – I use mine at least weekly, and have had it for years!
— Boat & Tote bags | Incredibly sturdy and incredibly classic. I like mine open top, in navy, with sans serif embroidery. I find this to be a versatile gift at a great price point that’s easy to personalize – you could embroider her initials, nickname, or something funny or practical! Plus, they introduced the most beautiful medium blue this year!
— Geometry napkins | I split two packs of these between my Mom and I for Mother’s Day this year, and they were a hit with both of us! The suede-like material requires no ironing for a smooth fold and there are dozens and dozens of patterns to choose from.
— Something meaningful, framed | We recently gifted John’s parents a house portrait as a housewarming gift and framed it with Framebridge – a favorite I’ve used for many projects over the years. There are lots of house portrait options on Etsy, too!
— Solo stove | Yes, this gift was all the rage a few years ago, but it’s still worth a mention! Produces a near-smokeless fire in a compact, good-looking package. Pair with extendable sticks and the absolute best thing to sandwich a marshmallow between.
— Tea kettle | An elegant countertop tea kettle for the tea, coffee, or hot chocolate drinker in your life! We’ve gifted these twice and they’re always a hit. Lots of fun options for this one – pair it with some gourmet or meaningful tea or coffee, a pretty tea towel, and/or a mug that will make them smile!
— Something from White Flower Farm | This is my father-in-law’s favorite plant source, and we have ordered many things from them over the years! Bulbs, wreaths, flowering houseplants – or a gift card for them to choose something for their yard.
— A photo gift | Don’t sleep on the photo mug, friends! Are they a little cheesy? Yes. Do lots of grandparents legitimately want one? Absolutely yes, but they’re not, you know, something you’re going to buy for yourself. A personalized calendar with photos from the year is another sure bet!
— A live wreath | This was our go-to teacher gift for several years running – we bought simple wreaths from a local fundraiser and dressed them up with bows. I have also done the same for hostess gifts! L.L. Bean has beautiful options if you need to ship.
— A media subscription | Whether physical or digital, this is one of my favorite things to give. In recent years, I’ve given an Our State subscription to a friend, an Atlantic subscription to my Dad, and a So Many Thoughts subscription to my Mom.
— A digital picture frame | The siblings went in on this for John’s parents a few years ago, and it’s so easy to upload new photos by email!
Whew!! I sincerely hope you found an idea in there for the ones you love, or that something I listed sparked an even better idea. And happiest Thanksgiving, friends! I’ll be back with a final gift guide on Friday :)
I have a discouraging number of half-finished posts in the queue, including at least one other travelogue (our summer trip to Michigan!)… but also no hesitations about bumping this one to the top.
In my last post, I wrote that we’d canceled our trip to Lake Lure in the wake of Hurricane Helene and wouldn’t be traveling to the North Carolina mountains this fall. The whole family was torn up about this, but John especially so. Once the storm passed, he stewed over what to do for days: travel to the Lake Lure Airbnb and use it as a base to volunteer with a local organization, leaving the kids with family or friends? Cancel the Airbnb and head to the Virginia mountains? Stay home entirely?
While we felt called to volunteer, our original rental was without power and water. And though we love the Virginia mountains, it felt wrong to bail on our beloved NC in her time of need. As the days passed after the storm, the messaging out of Western North Carolina became more nuanced: yes, some areas were devastated and not ready to receive visitors, though they coveted our aid (and would for a long time). Other areas, however, were open and ready for business – and, in many cases, desperate for it. Fall tourism dollars are incredibly important to these towns, and the blanket messaging of “don’t travel to WNC” had really hurt them.
So, following NC’s travel advisory, we rerouted our trip to Bryson City. We had wanted to visit for years, but had stopped short of Bryson City, in the far western reaches of the state, in favor of the more accessible mountain towns of Boone, Blowing Rock, or Asheville. With those off the table, we happily drove a tad farther – a little less than five hours from the Triangle – to our destination.
It was a delightful weekend. The weather was perfect, and we logged some gorgeous hikes, ate good food, and rested and relaxed together. We also got to support some mountain businesses that were extremely grateful for our presence, and though we are no saviors, we were grateful to get to be a tiny part of bringing hope in a bleak time.
To my fellow NC folks, or those in surrounding states: consider a fall or winter trip to the mountains if you can. NC’s tourism site is regularly updated with an interactive map of areas that are ready to receive you, as well as lots of other helpful information. If our trip is any indication, it will be a blessing to them and even more so a blessing to you.
Ready for a little Bryson City travelogue? Let’s do it!
FRIDAY
Our goal was to leave our home at 8:30am, but if you know us at all you are not surprised to hear we left at 9 o’clock on the dot. Time was of the essence because we planned to eat lunch at Haywood Smokehouse in Dillsboro which, at over four hours away, would have tested the bounds of our young travelers’ stomachs even if we had arrived perfectly on time. Still, we endured the drive pleasantly enough with the help of lots of snacks and a third or fourth listen through of On the Night Train, the audio mystery our kids can’t quit.
Our drive was clear, but as we got toward the mountains, we passed tons of downed trees along the roadside. Once, we saw an evergreen farm whose trees were marked with a mud line about four feet up their branches.
We arrived in Dillsboro, a very cute and very tiny downtown, around 1:30. There’s about one block of commerce, but it was plenty for our purposes: we had lunch at the Smokehouse (where the kids discovered they all loved Brunswick Stew) then poked around in the shops near the railroad depot. The Fox’s Burrow was our favorite (we snagged lots of Christmas gifts!), but it was sobering to see the floor and about one foot of wall stripped back to plywood because of the flooding.
From the shops we crossed the railroad tracks to the river itself, and it was beautiful – clear and running swiftly. We walked along the edge for a bit before doubling back to our car and continuing on the last half hour to Bryson City itself.
We arrived at our rental around 4 and the kids’ usual flurry of excitement over exploring a new house kicked in. They raced up and down the stairs and then out the back door where a capacious porch swing and wide, shallow creek waited. I helped John bring our bags inside then curled up with a blanket and my book – this one, loved it so much and now I want to call everyone honey – on the swing. I read for an hour or so while John napped and the kids pretended to be puppies and spies.
Around 6:30 we gathered ourselves, added another layer (it was chilly!), and headed out for dinner in town, about five minutes away. We put our name in at Anthony’s then explored the railway depot and a few shops while we waited. A local legend, Anthony’s reminded me of all the traditional Italian restaurants in all the little towns I’ve ever visited :) We ended the evening with our first of many trips to The Chocolate Shoppe for truffles, squares of toffee, and rock candy sticks, which we ate on our rental’s comfy sectional as we watched Cinderella.
SATURDAY
We woke to another crisp mountain morning on Saturday. We dressed for hiking and drove into town for breakfast at La Dolce Vita, which had yummy bagel sandwiches, cinnamon rolls, muffins, and more.
After breakfast, we drove across the boundary line into Great Smoky Mountains National Park – the most-visited national park and one we had yet to experience! We parked and set off on the Deep Creek Loop Trail, opting for the 2.5 mile configuration in consideration of little legs. We saw deer, crossed wooden bridges, admired changing leaves, and paused for a snack by one of several waterfalls before looping back to our car about two hours later.
After a quick lunch at High Test Deli (YUM) and a hot chocolate from La Dolce Vita, it was time to board the train!
We had reserved open-air tickets on the 2pm Great Smoky Mountains Railroad Nantahala Gorge excursion. Our family had an entire bench to ourselves, with plenty of room to sit, stand, stretch out, and move around. The train whistle sounded and we pulled out of Bryson City at about 2:20, traveling through kudzu forest, past Appalachian homes, and across a trestle bridge over Fontana Lake before arriving at the Nantahala Outdoors Center around 4:45pm.
We had about an hour at the center before boarding the train for the journey home – enough time to grab a snack and watch a practice session of a US national junior team canoe slalom racer! Very cool. Then it was back on the train for a glowy sunset steam back into the Bryson City depot, arriving around 7pm. We snagged a quick dinner at The Rice Wagon, a food truck permanently parked at the Mountain Layers Brewery in downtown, and more treats at The Chocolate Shoppe before heading home for a dip in our hot tub.
SUNDAY
We got off to a slower start on Sunday morning – a perk for the kids of most family trips like this is getting to watch a few episodes of a show while mom and dad wake up – and rolled into Bryson City Bakery around 10:30.
Wow. All the pastries are made in store and are giant and delicious. We went with a few more traditional options but drooled over the cases of apple galettes, peanut butter pie stuffed croissants, s’mores cruffins, maple pecan twists, vanilla bean morning buns, and white chocolate scones with blackberry glaze. While John stood in line, I wandered over to the adjacent general store, MRKT on the Square, and picked up a few more gifts for Christmas from their selection of kitchen goods, toys, and art supplies.
We wrapped up breakfast, hopped in the car, and drove about 30 minutes to Mingo Falls. Though we didn’t have a chance to stop at any of the historical or educational sites along the way, it was neat to see the Cherokee syllabary on signs as we passed through. And of course, Mingo Falls is well worth the trip on its own – it’s a short but steep .3 mile hike to a stunningly tall waterfall. Steps are built into the hillside to make it a bit easier. The big kids bounded up like goats while John and I hoofed it up behind them, Annie on John’s shoulders for part of the time. We hung out at the top for a good half hour and let the kids explore before heading back down.
We continued our circumnavigation of the Smokies and entered the national park again, driving 45 minutes to reach Kuwohi (formerly known as Clingman’s Dome, and the highest point in Tennessee, in the Smokies, and on the Appalachian Trail). The drive was gorgeous: similar in feel to the Blue Ridge Parkway, with curving roads that hug the mountainside and expansive vistas dotted with blazing foliage.
After finding a parking spot (tough on a beautiful fall day!), we set off on the Forney Ridge Trail around 2pm. AllTrails describes it as having a “captivating forest atmosphere,” and I couldn’t agree more.
We trotted along mossy stone steps, across wooden beam walkways, and through sunlit-filled pine forests to reach Andrews Bald about two miles and one hour later.
John selected this hike especially for me, as I’m always pestering him about visiting balds – unique mountains in the Southern Appalachians that are topped with treeless, grassy meadows instead of rocks or trees and thus boast incredible views. Andrews Bald did not disappoint: it was glorious to sprawl on the grass and snack on apples, peanut butter crackers, peanut m&ms, and mini Chomps before turning around.
But we weren’t done yet!! Two miles later we made it back to the parking lot and were all ready to sit down – but we were at the start of the Kuwohi Observation Tower trail, and we (or at least the parents, ha) wanted to make it to the top. Like Mingo Falls, we were in for another short, steep hike – this time, .5 miles each way and 337 feet of elevation gain. It’s a paved trail, but man, it was a rough add-on after the afternoon’s hike.
But also worth it! We hoofed it up the trail, the kids trailing comically behind us, and eventually made it to the top to enjoy the 360-degree views.
But only for a few minutes :) Back in the car and looking at the clock, we debated whether the timing was too tight to go back and change before our dinner reservation, but agreed that if we could be in and out of the house in ten minutes we could arrive within the grace period. Cut to the five of us sprinting and giggling through the house to get out of our hiking clothes and into mountain dinner appropriate attire as fast as possible :)
Our reservation was at the Fryemont Inn’s dining room, and it was a trip. Think summer camp dining hall, think big stone fireplace, think 100+ year old history. All dinners include the soup of the day (BLT soup on the day we visited!), a mixed green salad, the entree of your choice, three family-style side dishes, and dessert. (Plus soda for the kids, a thrill!) Was it the most delicious, creative food I’ve ever eaten in my life? It was not. But it was homey and memorable and a perfect way to cap off a mountain-y day.
MONDAY
We slept in, then packed up the house and drove to brunch at Mountain Perks, which had delicious bagel sandwiches and the kindest staff.
After browsing a few more shops, we ended our time in Bryson City with a visit to Darnell Farms. Nestled right against the Tuckasegee River, it had swings, a giant hollowed-out tree, knobbly pumpkins, a farm shop, and a hay maze to explore.
And that, my friends, is our trip to Bryson City! While BC is a bit rougher around the edges than some other mountain towns we’ve visited, it is so lovable and we were so grateful to get to visit it – and our beloved mountains – in this unusual fall.
If you’re planning a trip to Bryson City, I hope this recap was helpful! Any questions, I’m happy to answer – just leave them in the comments! (And if you’d like to see this weekend in motion, I had fun making this little video.)
Transferring to your college Always installing the car seats Serving as your human alarm clock Folding tiny pairs of underwear just so Reading an essay he wants to share with you as you both lie in bed and not minding when you fall asleep halfway through Going to small group, pressing into friendship Driving the old car
The middle-of-the-night parent, the patient parent, the fun parent
Hearing “my wife” across the room, a thrill still Researching the candidates Falling asleep with the light on and Grumbling about how you stay up too late to read
Making every hard decision less scary Never ever giving you a reason to doubt Always reaching for you, always beside you
An unending conversation with my best friend Who we were and who we are The most fun we’ve ever had So simple, so grand.
In honor of our 12th anniversary, inspired by Jen.
