Maybe due to my nature, or maybe due to my job, I love January — full stop. You can keep your memes about how it’s 1,000 days long; I’ll keep it rolling as long as possible. And this January seemed like an especially January January for me. John and I laid some foundations for the year ahead (a fresh budget, vacation plans), I dug in deep on a big project and saw some early fruit, and I introduced some tiny new habits that have already made a big difference. How can you not love January, friends?!
But all good things must come to an end – on to February!
On my calendar: — I was asked to be a mentor in a freshmen women’s leadership program at my alma mater this semester and was matched with a gal who seems just lovely. We have our first monthly call this week! — The Divine Consign kids consignment sale. I visited in the fall for the first time and – dare I say it – it *may* have had a better selection than my beloved Hayes Barton. Certainly for older kids! — My birthday! It falls on a Wednesday this year, which is one of my weekdays off. After putting my nose to the grindstone on these days all January, I’m giving myself the gift of a purely fun day during the kids’ school hours. I’ll volunteer in June’s classroom to start things off (my usual weekly slot), then might take myself to a few thrift shops (I’ve been wanting to visit Pigfish Lane), eat lunch out (maybe with friends?!), and who knows what else? I’m excited.
What I’m loving right now (friend edition!): — My friend Cherith’s incredibly-helpful small business planner, which is like a wise friend to hold your hand as you create a business plan step-by-step. I had the joy of editing it at several steps in the production process, and it’s comprehensive and delightful! — The Bear’s “Forks”. I was already planning to recommend this standalone episode (it’s the only one of the show I’ve seen!), and then my friend Pressley went and wrote this essay that perfectly encapsulates its perfection. You truly can watch it even if you know nothing about the show, and I recommend you do. — Bumble Brews Play Cafe in Raleigh. My friend Libby opened this darling space in December with her husband, and the Articles Club gals feel like we’ve been along for the small business ride – not for the faint of heart! Stop by for a delicious warm beverage and a cozy space to play with your little one (they recommend 0-6!).
Okay — one more! (And not exactly a BFF but a gal can dream.)
As a reminder, you can find allll the things I’ve loved over the last few years neatly organized right here!
What you’re loving right now:
This is where I highlight a few items here that have been popular in the last month with fellow readers, based on my analytics. Here’s hoping this will help you find something you’ll love!
— Y’all! The Articles Club Guide was a favorite from January! Thank you for being excited alongside us for our little niche slice of joy :) — The sticky mini easel pad we use for Team Thomas Tuesdays — The pink mailbox we use for Valentine’s Day fun — this one is very similar — Outlive, a book that’s playing a central role in one of my 2024 goals — The Anxious Generation, a book we’ve preordered x 3 (how happy am I that two of the top five are books?)
Last month on The Connected Family:
Adding a segment to round up the previous month’s posts on TCF! So many of you have subscribed (thank you!), but if you haven’t, and a conversation about kids, technology, and family culture sounds meaningful for you, I’d love for you to join us.
This was an unusual month for reading! I’m stretching several books (The Great Dechurching, Outlive, and Made for People) over a longer span for various reasons, and so only have a few to report on in full. They are:
— The Vanderbeekers Make a Wish | I continue to be wowed and delighted by how Karina Yan Glaser tackles harder topics for elementary kids with warmth, gentleness, and discernment. A favorite series for sure. — The Armor of Light | Another excellent installment of the epic Kingsbridge series! Made me want to go back and read the original – maybe this summer :) — Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets | June received the illustrated second installment for her eighth birthday and we whizzed through it together.
Revisiting my January goals: Kick off The Connected Family well with four weekly posts (Yes! Exceeded my expectations in every way and I’m super grateful. I was honored to earn a little orange check mark in the last week of the month, which marks a Substack bestselling publication. Thank you, thank you, thank you again!) Write ahead to complete drafts of February’s TCF posts (I did not get quite as far as I was hoping, but I did complete drafts of three (out of five) posts for the month!) Complete at least 85 hours of deep work (Whew, this one kicked my tail! A learning curve for sure. I chose 85 because it’s roughly 1000 / 12, but I fell decidedly short for various reasons and amassed 35. Adjusting for February!) Send an inquiry to our top builder candidate (Inquiry sent and we also had an initial meeting. We are waiting to hear back from him on next steps but we have a lot to consider.) Begin the Bible Recap reading plan (Yes, indeed! On track and it has been great so far! We listen together while we’re getting ready for bed.) Read the first three chapters of Outlive (Done! This was greatly helped by a tip from Lara that the audiobook is available on Spotify Premium, which we already pay for.) Take the Birds and Bees course (We set a date in February!) Prep for our Valentines mailbox (Underway! It’s been fun to come up with a few new ideas this year, like making wax paper crayon suncatchers, trying out the pasta maker we were gifted and have never used (eep), and a Poppin kit from HMart.)
February goals: — Reach out to an upholsterer and/or visit a showroom for goal no. 1 — Rehab and paint June’s new (old) desk, which my parents drove down from their home in Connecticut. She chose Purple Cream for the color :) — Finalize the secrets + swag for the AC retreat — Complete at least 60 hours of deep work (which works out to about 3 hours for every weekday in February, with a little grace built in) — Write one module of the TCF course — Read chapters 4, 5, and 6 of Outlive — Take the Birds & Bees course with John
As a reminder, many of these are drawn from my 2024 goals!
Next week’s post is a dear and personal one for me… looking forward to sharing it with you. Until then, I’d love to hear your thoughts on January — or anything else you’d like to chat about!
You may recall that one of my informal “resolutions” for 2023 was chronicling our trips on EFM within a month of returning home. I’m happy to say that I stuck to it, including for the Articles Club retreat, our road trip to Serenbe and Watercolor, weekend trips to the Biltmore and Beaufort, our anniversary weekend in Charleston, and a long weekend in Boone. It’s a resolution I’m carrying into 2024, so expect more prompt travelogues coming your way in the months to come :)
But before we kick off 2024 travel, there’s one trip from 2023 I have yet to chronicle: Thanksgiving week in the Florida Keys with my extended family. I’d love to share a few photos and details, if you’d like to see!
Like last year’s trip to Watercolor, this Thanksgiving trip was in honor of a major wedding anniversary for one of our parents – in this case, my parents’ 40th (albeit two years delayed!). They graciously paid for most of the trip, and once we jointly decided on the Florida Keys as our destination, they handed over the reins to John to plan the details.
This was an honor and something he was happy to do (travel planning is one of his hobbies!), but it was also intimidating! Though my family travels a well-worn groove to Maine each year, we haven’t done much other group travel. Within our numbers we have different accommodation, budget, and activities preferences, and so it was nerve-wracking for John to feel he was making decisions for a varied group, for a destination we’d never been to, and for an expensive (!) and milestone trip like this.
But of course, he did an amazing job. My expectations for the trip as a whole were exceeded and I think it’s safe to say everyone had a great time.
Where We Stayed in the Florida Keys:
After researching the many (many!) towns that make up the Florida Keys, we settled on Marathon for our home base. We were looking for cottage-style accommodations (versus hotel rooms), which limited our options. We ultimately decided on two side-by-side beach houses at Tranquility Bay in Marathon and were very pleased with the decision.
The beach houses each had a full kitchen, a dining room table, a living room area, three bedrooms, three bathrooms, and upper and lower porches. The upper porches had expansive views of the ocean and the lower porches had wide steps down to a grassy lawn that led to the beach and pool.
Getting to the Florida Keys:
Since we were joining up from various points in the country, getting to the Florida Keys was an adventure in itself. We opted to meet up in Fort Lauderdale on the Sunday before Thanksgiving before caravanning down to Marathon the next day. My sister and her family drove from Charlotte, and the rest of us flew into FLL from our respective home airports: Nashville, Raleigh, and Hartford.
We rented an SUV at the airport and got everyone to the Pelican Grand Beach Resort in Fort Lauderdale, where we were staying the night. We had plenty of time to eat lunch by the pool, wade in the waves on the wide beach, and have an outdoor dinner that night along the canal at Casa Sensei.
We chose the Pelican Grand because it had suites, which is always helpful for traveling with kids, and because it was right on the ocean with a pool and lazy river. We ate breakfast the next morning in their restaurant, which was convenient and yummy, but, you know, expensive :)
After breakfast we packed up and drove about an hour to Gator Park in the Florida Everglades – another National Park to check off our list!
We bought tickets (no reservations required) for an airboat tour of the Everglades and it was… perfect. And perfectly hilarious. Our boat captain was straight out of central casting – everything you could hope for in a gator guide. He had a deep, gravely voice, skin browned from years in the sun, and personal names for all the gators. He expertly guided us through the reedy channels and opened the throttle as we skimmed over the marsh grasses. We saw LOTS of gators, many swimming right next to the boat. Annie slept through the whole thing :)
Things to Do in the Florida Keys:
After the gator tour and a quick lunch, we drove the remaining 2.5 hours south to Marathon for our next four days in the Keys. We worked hard to create an itinerary that reflected everyone’s interests, and it paid off – we pretty much stuck to it!
After checking in on Monday around 5pm, we headed to dinner on-site at the Butterfly Cafe, Tranquility Bay’s nicer restaurant. We ate outside on the porch at a verrrrry long table, and it was delightful.
The next day (Tuesday) we spent the morning moving between the pool and the beach, where there was cornhole, a giant chessboard, and a volleyball net. We ate lunch on the beach, too, at TJ’s, the resort’s other (more casual) on-property restaurant.
This was a very relaxed day — Annie napped at the house in the afternoon, and the rest of us read, played games, visited the beach, chatted, and swam in the pool. Kim, John, and I even made it to Tranquility Bay’s gym, which was actually really fun to do together :)
For dinner we headed to Burdine’s Waterfront, a casual bar and grill at a marina where we had hush puppies, cheeseburgers, shrimp burgers, key lime pie, and delicious fries — and a gorgeous sunset! We finished the evening with a round of mini golf and games back at the house.
The next day (Wednesday) was our day trip to Key West! I was a little unsure of what to expect because, you know, Key West is known for being kooky, but it was a great day. We started by touring the West Martello Gardens and Fort. The botanical garden is on the site of a former Civil War fort; admission is free and it’s beautiful.
We then drove a short distance to the Truman Waterfront Park, home to the US Coast Guard cutter Ingham, now a floating maritime museum.
As many of you know, my Dad was an officer in the Coast Guard for most of my life, and even served on the Ingham briefly during the Mariel boatlift. It was incredibly cool and meaningful to get to tour it with my kids and to share this important part of our family’s life, and I can only imagine how special it was for my Dad to get to do it with all his grandkids.
After about an hour and a half on the ship, we walked over to Kaya Island Eats for a late lunch. Fish tacos under a shade canopy hit the spot.
While we considered taking a photo with the famous Southernmost Point Buoy, the line was insane – so we hopped back in the car for the hourlong drive back to Marathon, which all of the kids took as an opportunity to nap. Once home, some of us went in the pool and we made tacos for dinner at the house.
The next day was Thursday – Thanksgiving! And what an unusual Thanksgiving it was :) We watched a bit of the parade in the morning, then set off for a kayak adventure through the mangroves of Boot Key (we booked our rentals through Key Kayak).
It was incredible! We saw dolphins, leaping manta rays, and manatees so close we could touch them (!!!) while on our two-hour tour. (For those wondering, I had Annie and June in one tandem kayak and John and Shep were in the other, while the rest of the fam took either tandems or singles.)
We headed back to the house to rinse off or hop in the pool while some of the grown-ups got Thanksgiving dinner ready. We had opted to order a meal from Publix catering, and while we were all pleasantly surprised at the quality and tastiness, it was more challenging than we expected to get everything warm and on the table at once. (Little things like not having tin foil tripped us up!) But we did it, and we were more than thankful to get to celebrate together :)
We closed out the day by catching the sunset from Seven-Mile Bridge, a Florida Keys classic if there ever was one, and with a performance by the kids of their original song about my parents – set to the tune of “Wouldn’t It Be Nice” by the Beach Boys, which was their wedding song. John’s credited on the liner notes as a co-lyricist :)
On our last full day in the Keys we had yet another very special adventure: a dolphin encounter at the Dolphin Research Center! Needless to say, the kids were incredibly excited about this and I don’t blame them: this was something I desperately wanted to do when I was their age. (As an aside, granting my kids a wish that went unfulfilled in my child is an interesting experience: there’s joy and delight in doing it, yes, but it can also bring up worries about “spoiling” them or whether they’ll truly appreciate what they’re being given. But I DIGRESS.)
For both our kids and the kids inside us, this was a delightful excursion. We got to get in the water with the dolphins, touch them, lead them in skills, hold hoops for them to swim to, watch them leap out of the water, and learn more about the center and the research and rehabilitation they do. Very, very cool. We had lunch at Island Fish Co (good, but not my favorite), then headed back to Tranquility Bay for naps and more dips in the pool. Our last meal was a spaghetti dinner in the cottage – easy!
We packed up on Saturday morning and went our separate ways – some flying and some driving.
Though I wouldn’t want to spend Thanksgiving in the Keys, or even at a destination, every year, it was a fun adventure to do it this year. We squeezed in many memorable moments in celebration of a very wonderful anniversary, and I’m grateful we could be together. (And grateful to my parents for making it happen, in more ways than one!)
If you have any questions, I’m happy to answer them in the comments! Thanks for letting me share, friends!
Generally, I prefer to look forward. I love to dream and imagine the future, and we’re lucky to have reason to hope for good things ahead.
Looking back can be harder. It’s a reminder of the good things that have happened, yes, but an inevitable reminder of the passing of time, too – and, depending on my mood, that can be fraught. (I know I’m not alone in this!)
Still: looking back in intentional ways has helped me to take what I can from each year, to appreciate what it had to offer, to learn what it had to give, to acknowledge the hard and appreciate the good. Our lives are what we give our attention to, and these posts are my way of giving a little attention to the year of my life I just lived. Thank you, as always, for indulging me!
As always, our year started by celebrating our best big girl turning another year older – this time with a birthday hike on the big day and a petite pottery painting party a few days later. We said goodbye to the CWM commercial office space and I headed to the beach for a weekend with the Articles Club gals. On the blog, I shared my reading list, my goals, and – for the first time – our family goals for the year.
There were more celebrations in February! In lieu of 2022 Christmas gifts, my sisters and I (and husbands) chose to go out to dinner together – not so easy since we don’t live in the same place! – and we were able to make it happen at Kindred over Presidents Day. We also stuffed our Valentine’s mailbox, went to see the Duke basketball team play and Riverdance tour for my birthday (reflections here), finished the first Harry Potter, and started composting (a long-awaited splurge).
We spent lots of time outdoors in March, including on the field and sidelines for another soccer season for June and Shep. I chaperoned my first elementary school field trip (a dream come true, as silly as it sounds!), we replaced our roof after hail damage, and we kicked off our spring break trip with 20 hours in Serenbe, a nostalgic treat from my SW days.
In April, we reached our spring break destination – a return to Watercolor, Florida, to celebrate John’s parents’ 50th anniversary with the whole family! This is where we discovered Annie is obsessed with belly flopping into pools, ha. We celebrated Easter in Greenville, SC on our road trip back (complete with an ER visit after having to administer the epipen.) We took another little weekend trip to Asheville, where we met up with my younger sister to celebrate her paying off her student loans, and I traveled to Texas for work. Whew!! In between trips, we picked strawberries and June had her first piano recital.
With school out for the summer, June swam on our neighborhood team for the first time (and greatly enjoyed learning group dances on the pool deck), the kids played street soccer almost daily with neighbors, and June and Shep camped in the backyard solo. I hosted another book swap, biked the American Tobacco Trail with a dear friend (44 miles!), and we took one of our favorite trips of the year to Beaufort, NC before heading north to spend a week with my parents, sister, and cousins in Connecticut.
We began the month of July in Maine at our island and concluded it with Shep blowing out the candles at home on his fifth birthday. In between, we had a stopover in DC on our road trip south, an insane rash from moths (!), many evenings at the pool, and a joint birthday party with Shep’s best friend at a local park. On the blog, I shared a few takeaways from Habits of the Household, my favorite nonfiction read of the year.
In August, we welcomed two of our nieces and nephews for a week of cousin camp, highlighted by the debut of the Best Friends Snack Shack, hikes, and our nephew learning to ride a bike! We discussed the Barbie movie with an all-pink Articles Club, stayed with John’s parents for a week at their new home in Virginia (so much closer to us!), and kicked off another season of soccer at a field we can walk to. And then school started – second grade for June and a final year of preschool for Shep!
September saw the advent of Team Thomas Tuesdays, a dream many years in the making. It’s been (mostly) a delight! We also organized our garage – a sore spot in our home that had been dogging us for years – with some professional help. In honor of our 11th wedding anniversary, John and I had a special date night to see Wicked and took a quick weekend trip to Charleston (not without its relationship lessons). We led a book study at church onThe Common Rule and I started volunteering weekly in June’s classroom to run a reading group.
We had another favorite trip in October – to Boone, NC – as well as a memorable gathering for the 8th anniversary of Articles Club, a visit to the state fair, our annual camping trip with the Rays, and a chocolate chip cookie tasting party. Sadly, John’s back pain flared up again and he continued to battle it for the rest of the year.
In November, we met up with cousins for a coooold day at the zoo, I biked the ATT one more time, we had friends over for what we hope will be many more Sunday pizza hangs in 2024 (more about that soon!), and we celebrated Thanksgiving in the Florida Keys with my family in honor of my parents’ 40th anniversary. (Annie’s first flight!)
December felt full, slow, and all about community. We fit in lots of beloved Christmas traditions – many with friends or family in tow – but worked hard to keep plenty of white space for playing, baking, and reading books at home, too. Shep started the very lowest-key basketball, a new delight of his life, and at the end of the month, we hosted my family for a few days of Christmas fun and then flew to California to be hosted alongside all of John’s family at his sister’s home for even more.
For us, each year in the life of our young family is a delicate balance – between travel and staying home, between “new” and “the same,” between pushing and choosing rest, between work and play, between freedom and control. We do not get it right all the time, not by a long shot – but we try. We think deeply about it, and pray for wisdom, and act carefully, and adjust as we go. It’s both rewarding and overwhelming to see a year in our life summed up like this, but as always, I’m choosing gratitude. It’s not hard, and for that I am, well, grateful.
Friends, I know I’ve said it before, but I am SO excited for what we’ll discuss here (and elsewhere) in 2024. Thank you for being here, and for sharing so generously with me! It’s one of the delights of my life. Wishing you a healthy, happy, and abundant new year. My 2024 goals are just about ready to share, so I’ll see you soon! :)
I hope you’ve all had wonderful holidays, friends! Our days have been full – hosting family, traveling to see family, and squeezing in some favorite traditions. Still, I’ll always make time for the two posts I have planned for this week: today’s best of and my traditional final post, our year-in-review. They help me count the fruit from another precious year, and that’s an opportunity I’ll fight for even in the midst of these full, chaotic, slow post-holiday days. I hope they can serve as an opportunity for a little reflection on your own 2023, if you haven’t had a chance for it yet! In the comments, please share a few of your best memories, finds, and favorites from 2023, if you’d like. As always, I can’t wait to hear!
Best adventure, travel, or trip: Though there was a lot of superlative travel in 2023, two weekend trips rise to the top in my memories: our Father’s Day trip to Beaufort, NC and our fall break trip to Boone. I’d repeat both of those any day. Though I love to travel with extended family, John and I still find it a bit thrilling to structure a trip around our immediate family’s culture. They feel like a chance to live out what matters to us in a concentrated way. (Yes, cinnamon sugar donut moments included.)
Best trend you tried: Though I maintain a dark skinny jean is still the best and most versatile bottom, I have branched out – particularly with these cropped wide leg pants. The green (“olive oil”) goes with a surprising amount and they’re fun to wear. I take a S.
Best new podcast listen, newsletter subscribe, or blog follow: Even though I’ve admired his work since 2018 (when I first read The Coddling of the American Mind), Jon Haidt’s Substack was a new follow for me this year. If you’re interested in what we’re going to talk about at The Connected Family, you’ll likely want to hit subscribe on Jon, too.
Best book: This was a banner year of reading for me! I read 44 books, significantly more than in the recent past, including 22/24 from my reading list. (Last year, I read 21 books total.) The Maid, Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and The Lincoln Highway took top billing for fiction and Habits of the Household won out for nonfiction. (I shared a few of my takeaways here.) A special honorable mention to the first four books in the Vanderbeekers series, which June and I passed back and forth over several months. Adore!
Best TV show:Slow Horses on Apple TV. We watched three seasons this year! (They’re only six episodes each.) It’s a bit of an acquired taste, what with a central character who gives the word “slovenly” new meaning, but the plots are fantastic. “What makes the series better than virtually anything else on television right now [is] its ability to be both a riveting espionage drama and an absurd workplace comedy, without ever flubbing the mix.”
Best movie:Mission Impossible 6, continuing our tradition of going to the movie theater (almost) only on opening nights for Tom Cruise films.
Best album, song, or artist: If our Spotify Wrapped is any indication, it’s Seven by Brooke Ligertwood all the way.
Best kiddo milestone: After seven years, we finally removed the baby gate at the bottom of our stairs. It’s the end of an era!
Best friend memory: Rewinding to the first month of the year, the first annual Articles Club weekend retreat was, well, a treat. We ate delicious meals, laughed until we cried, and built another layer on our 7+ year friendship. Biking the American Tobacco Trail (twice!) while discussing one of my favorite books of the year with a favorite friend is a sweet memory, too!
Best beauty purchase: My cheeks got a glow-up this year! After being taught the proper order to apply bronzer, blush, and highlighter, I put my newfound knowledge into practice with this, this, and my discontinued BeautyCounter blush. Love them all!
Best faith grower: This doesn’t feel like the “holiest” answer, but I’m going with it: watching the first two seasons of The Chosen, the historical drama TV show based on the life of Jesus. By telling the story through the eyes of those who knew him, layering in prophecy and present, it truly brought the Gospels to life in a way I’d never seen before.
Best new tradition: I’m not sure if this is a tradition or a habit or a little luxury, but I’ll drop it here. Our Sundays really settled into a restful rhythm: for most of the year, we’d attend church, go out to eat, head home so everyone could take a nap (except June, who would read), then tennis lessons for me and June, the easiest and most crowd-pleasing dinner (frozen meatballs, Rao’s, pasta), and finally a little light prepping for the week ahead.
Best habit you created: Driving 20 mph in the neighborhood. After a tragedy struck too close to home earlier in the year, I committed to driving under the speed limit in our neighborhood whenever possible. This feels like the kind of vow I might have made in the moment and then forget in the bustle of life, so I’m grateful to have stuck with it.
Most surprising goal progress: I set a goal to reach 5,000 minutes on Peloton this year and am shocking even myself by rounding the corner to 8,000 this week – a big jump from last year, when I logged just shy of 4,000! I was helped by Peloton adding tracking for outdoor walks and cycling, but I significantly upped my stretching and strength classes, too.
Best mama moment: There were so many favorite moments, remarkable in their ordinariness and preciousness, but reading the first Harry Potter with June is a particularly sweet memory. And, of course, our weekend together at camp!
Best home improvement: Our green bathroom cabinets make me happy every single time I round the corner!
Best little luxury you’ve enjoyed: Hear me out: getting places on time (or even with time to spare). John has many incredible attributes, but getting places on time is generally not one of them. Add in three children, and our default is often a late arrival. When I transitioned from working four days to three days at the beginning of this year, I suddenly found myself arriving places five or ten minutes early on my two weekdays off, and it truly felt luxurious.
As always, I’m ending the year so grateful for the delights, big and small, that filled our year. I’ll be sharing more in my year-in-review post soon, but in the meantime, please do share: what are some of your “bests” from 2023? Can’t wait to hear!
