I am aware that we are in the sweetest of sweet spots in our family’s life. It’s rather unfashionable to say so – the more correct thing to say is that there is beauty in every season, and that we shouldn’t elevate one over another – but sometimes unfashionable things are also true. Of course (of course!) there is beauty in every season: I fully expect to delight in our family when everyone has graduated from elementary school, when we have teens, and when kids are home on college break. I will relish the days when we can all huddle around the same game board and no one is whining to be carried on a hike.
And yet: so many people say that the years between six and twelve are the golden ones for family life, and I can see why. Our kids are squarely within our sphere of influence. They like our home the best and spending time together the most. They don’t have phones or computers – there’s no algorithm shaping, splintering, spoiling their psyches. They’re growing more capable every day and look out for each other while on the go. They’re full of questions and eager for answers, willing accomplices, sweet and genuine and unguarded. They smile and hug and snuggle and hold our hands.
They also bicker, and vehemently express outsize opinions about inconsequential things. They complain and whine and dawdle and melt down. I lose my patience and come down hard in the wrong places and make the more expedient choice instead of the one I know is better in the long-term.
This is family life, with all of its joys and furies. This is our life together, and here I am to mark one more year in its span: to pin it down in my memory, to examine it from each side like the jewel-tone butterfly it is. Thank you, as always, for indulging me. xo
As ever, our year began by celebrating another birthday for our big girl – this time with a “birthday day of fun” with one of her best friends. We went to the Life & Science Museum in the morning, a rock climbing gym in the afternoon, and rounded out the day with her first ever sleepover. We invited a contractor into our attic to talk about renovation possibilities, cousins came to visit, I re-sorted my bookshelf after almost a decade of rainbow order, and Shep played his first basketball season at a gym in our neighborhood – bliss! We also kicked off reading Little Pilgrim’s Progress in the mornings before school, something we’d continue all year until we finished in December. Finally, my beloved paternal grandmother passed away on the 19th anniversary of John’s and my first date – and my maternal grandparents’ wedding anniversary.
We wished for snow in February but were disappointed. Instead, we made classroom valentines, hiked on sunny days, made crayon sun catchers (still hanging many months later!), and cheered on the NC State gymnastics team with friends. We spent a long weekend in Virginia with grandparents and cousins and took our first visit to the National Zoo. I celebrated my birthday at the end of the month with antiques shopping and a solo lunch date, and on the blog, I shared some thoughts on beauty at age 37 and 6 small changes I’m glad I made.
We spent lots of time outdoors in March, including on the field and sidelines for another soccer season for June and Shep. We celebrated the first blooms from our fancy daffodils, shopped for Easter baskets for kids in our community, and *almost* put in an offer on a home in our neighborhood after a 24-hour scramble to get pre-approved for a mortgage. We flew to Connecticut to honor my grandmother’s life at her memorial service – I gave a eulogy based on these remembrances – and loved getting to visit with family at our farm. A week later we left for another spring break on Jekyll Island, this time in the turret and with friends! On the blog, I shared a second installment of our family’s faith formation practices.
April was filled with adventures big and small. We biked to church one morning – 9 miles round trip! – I chaperoned a field trip for June, and Shep took some tune-up swim lessons before his first season of neighborhood swim team. Perhaps most notably, I flew to Texas for DG’s annual retreat and met Cultivate’s new vice president, Jessica. It’s been a year of much change for CWM and this was the week it all kicked off. I left feeling hopeful, and though it’s been a year of ups and downs, I’m grateful for our small but mighty team. On the blog, I shared an update on our mortgage payoff plan.
We kicked off May with two back-to-back weekends of camping with friends, and then John and June one-upped us by camping a third weekend during their 22-mile backpacking trip! June, John, and I were all terribly proud of how well she did on this epic adventure with dad. In between, we picked strawberries, biked all over our town, finished soccer, and started neighborhood swim team. Shep graduated from our beloved preschool and grandparents came to town to celebrate. I also organized a flower bar at church for Mother’s Day, a sweet opportunity to serve some ladies I love.
In June, the two bigs finally cashed in on their Christmas IOU – tickets to The Lion King at DPAC! Their faces absolutely lit up when the cast sang and danced their way down the aisle inches from our seats. School let out for the summer and we adjusted to the work-from-home life with two kids around. Verdict: incredibly grateful to be able to do it, not without its frustrations. We rounded the month out with more cousin visits, a sweaty Durham Bulls game, hosting a neighborhood kindergarten breakfast, first swim meets, and one of our favorite weekends of the year: a trip to a North Carolina beach town over Father’s Day/Juneteenth. And in the midst of it all (how?!), I traveled back to Texas for Cultivate’s big PowerSheets photo shoot.
In July we were off to Michigan, one of our happiest of happy places! We tubed, hiked, fished, dined, and napped in the sun with 35 Thomas family members. Soon enough it was time to send June off for her first summer of sleepaway camp – two weeks in the North Carolina mountains! After a flurrying of planning and packing, we walked away from a big piece of our heart with a lump in our throats. Thanks be to God she thrived (even if she did only send us one letter, ha!). On the blog, I shared a mid-year update on my goals.
Sleepaway camp flowed right into another week of Cousin Camp – with an Olympics theme, naturally. We continued the cousin time with a week together in Maine. It was a treasure, as always, despite the fact that John was knocked out by COVID for almost the entirety of our stay. An especially dear memory is taking the Whaler to a tiny nearby island one afternoon with just my dad and the three kids.
Back at home, we celebrated Shep’s birthday with his own birthday day of fun – a train ride to Greensboro to visit the children’s museum with two buddies and their sibs. And soon enough it was back to school for all three, but this time both June and Shep were biking to elementary school!
On the blog, I shared a simple trick that makes the most of my clothing budget.
September: more soccer (this time, for Annie, as well!), our annual camping trip with the Rays (this time on Lake Gaston!), and a 12th anniversary trip to Asheville where we dined and dreamed. Just a week later, we helplessly watched as damage from Hurricane Helene mounted across Western North Carolina. Closer to home, I pushed through considerable nerves to speak for the first time on behalf of The Connected Family. It was a gracious group (including some EFM reader friends! Hi!!), and I’m looking forward to doing more of it in 2025. On the blog, I finally shared my apple cider scone recipe and an anniversary sort-of poem.
After much heartache over the fate of our fall mountains trip (the area we had planned to visit was too damaged to receive travelers), we rerouted to Bryson City in October. We were grateful to be there and gratefully received by shopkeepers and restaurants eager for tourists. We gathered for the 9th anniversary of Articles Club, visited the state fair, cheered on our favorite babysitter at the Homecoming game, celebrated Lara and Ari’s vow renewal, and I saw Kendra Adachi (the Lazy Genius!) speak at Quail Ridge.
November was a quiet month. We mostly stayed home, welcoming my family for an early Thanksgiving weekend and celebrating Nancy’s new baby with a nesting party (an absolutely brilliant idea – more about that soon!). I began painting this year’s book ornaments and we ended the month in Virginia with all of John’s family for Thanksgiving proper.
December was full of delights old – baking favorite recipes, reading beloved books – and new – most notably, attending a performance of Handel’s Messiah with dear girlfriends. As a family, we unfortunately battled sickness all month, but it didn’t stop us from enjoying Christmas at home and a few days in Blowing Rock with my family immediately afterward (including snow tubing for the first time for all three kids!).
For us, each year in the life of our young family is a delicate balance – between travel and staying home, between “new” and “the same,” between pushing and choosing rest, between work and play, between freedom and control. We do not get it right all the time, not by a long shot – but we try. We think deeply about it, and pray for wisdom, and act carefully, and adjust as we go. It’s both rewarding and overwhelming to see a year in our life summed up like this, but as always, I’m choosing gratitude. It’s not hard, and for that I am, well, grateful.
Friends, however often I can show up here, I am so grateful for what we’ll discuss in 2025. Thank you for always meeting me here, and for sharing so generously with me! It’s one of the delights of my life. Wishing you a healthy, happy, and abundant new year. I’m finishing up my 2025 goals and reading list and can’t wait to share, so I’ll see you soon! :)
I hope you’ve all had wonderful holidays, friends! Our days have been full – hosting family, traveling to see family, and squeezing in some favorite traditions. Still, I’ll always make time for the two posts I have planned for the end of the year: today’s best of and my traditional final post, our year-in-review. They help me count the fruit from another precious year, and that’s an opportunity I’ll fight for even in the midst of these full, chaotic, slow post-holiday days. I hope they can serve as an opportunity for a little reflection on your own 2024, if you haven’t had a chance for it yet! In the comments, please share a few of your best memories, finds, and favorites from 2024, if you’d like. As always, I can’t wait to hear!
Best adventure, travel, or trip: We had a number of memorable adventures this year, but the one that glows brightest in my mind is our long weekend cruising around on a golf cart on Bald Head Island. While I treasure our time in our families’ special summer places, the novelty of traveling to new places with just our little family always leads to rich memories.
Best trend you tried: Gen Z socks! Inspired by the mom (five years my junior) who ziplined alongside us on our anniversary trip, I was emboldened to try out a pair. (And found this ivory version looks better than stark white with my coloring.) I mostly wear them with workout outfits so far and feel young and hip whenever I do :)
Best new podcast listen, newsletter subscribe, or blog follow: I have long loved Coffee + Crumbs’ essays and podcast episodes, but this year I subscribed to the personal newsletter of the founder, Ashlee Gadd. She is truly an incredible writer and I love learning from someone who’s a kindred spirit – but with kids just a little older than mine.
Best meal: Dinner at The Pure & Proper in Black Mountain, NC. Just ask my family: they teased me for days (weeks?) about how much I raved about my dish – short rib with pumpkin pesto – but I stand by my enthusiasm.
Best movie:Twisters! John and I had a blast seeing it on opening night at the theater (and listening to the soundtrack for many weeks afterward).
Best album, song, or artist: This one is always tough for me to answer! I will say I enjoyed having this Nancy Meyers’ inspired playlist on in the background throughout December.
Best kiddo milestone: While the more obvious answer is Shep starting kindergarten, the one closer to my heart is adding him to our big kid read aloud crew. (The two milestones coincide at our house.) These evening read alouds have been the sweetest time with just June for the last few years, and though I’m sure we’ll continue to split off for certain books in the future, it’s been fun to welcome him in as we read through some of my favorites this fall.
Best life or mom hack: If a hack is something that makes a desired outcome easier, then the Brick certainly wins for 2024. This little gadget, attached to the side of our fridge, has made staying off my phone and staying present with my family at the times that matter practically seamless.
Best beauty purchase: Friends, I realized a dream I’d had since high school this year: laser hair removal! (Chalk it up to dance class five nights a week in those years.) I’m only three treatments in but giddy at the idea of never again shaving my underarms or bikini line.
Honorable mentions go to this hair oil, which takes the crunch out of my curly hair and adds shine when I blow dry it, and this concealer, which I was relieved to repurchase when Beauty Counter came back online.
Best faith grower: The Bible Recap! One of my 2024 goals, this is the first time I’ve read through the entire Bible with commentary along the way. It did exactly what I was hoping it would, and more – I’m more familiar with scripture and its narrative’s shape, I made connections I hadn’t understood before, and I’m finishing with a greater hunger and love for God’s Word.
Best new tradition: I wrote about this earlier this year, but our Christmas card album. I scrapped a half-filled-out Christmas memory book that I felt lukewarm about and replaced it with a simple album to hold our Christmas cards and newsletters and I couldn’t love it more.
Best habit you created: Implementing a default 20-20-20-60 workout on days I’m not able to do a full session. (I do 20 push-ups, 20 Romanian dead lifts, 20 squats, and hold a plank for 60 seconds.) It takes about five minutes and I can do it anywhere, so there’s no excuse not to!
Favorite blog post written: It’s no secret that I’ve written fewer posts here this year than usual, and I hate that that’s the case. I also accept that in this season I cannot do it all, and that getting The Connected Family off the ground has taken extra effort. Still, there are posts I look back on proudly, particularly this one about my grandmother (that formed the basis of my eulogy), this post on beauty, and this Marvelous Money post about helpful decisions we keep repeating.
Most surprising goal progress: I would have to say clarity on our housing future! This felt like a bit of an oddball goal when I set it – I had no clear outcome in mind – but we’re finishing the year having taken steps down several potential routes forward and armed with much more information than we had this time last year. With this being such a source of uncertainty for so many years, I’m grateful.
Best home improvement: Sadly, I can’t say it was recovering the white chairs (I’m just eh on the blue velvet I chose), but I am delighted by the cafe curtains we added in our kitchen and the green shoe cabinet we added in our foyer! Painting a desk for June’s room and finding a dresser for Annie were wins, too.
Best little luxury you’ve enjoyed: This is not new, but it is a luxury I enjoy each month: on Articles Club night, whether I’m hosting or not, John will take all three kids out for dinner at Chick-fil-a around 5:30 or 6. This means I have uninterrupted time to pick up the house, set the table, prep my dish, get dressed, or do a late read through of our articles for the evening before the gals arrive at 7:30. I’m grateful for the physical and mental space to get ready for one of the best nights of each month – and for the love from John it represents.
As always, I’m ending the year so grateful for the delights, big and small, that filled our year. I’ll be sharing more in my year-in-review post soon, but in the meantime, please do share: what are some of your “bests” from 2024? Can’t wait to hear!
Hello, friends! I hope you all had wonderful Thanksgivings. We were in Virginia with John’s family and the week left me feeling full and happy. We decorated sugar cookies, we played cards and Do You Love Your Neighbor, we went on a hike, we went into DC and had tea, and our Thursday table was full of all the usual favorites plus buttered noodles, a Thomas family tradition.
Perhaps my favorite part, though was the walks. Every morning, any adult siblings who were available snuck away for a brisk walk, 30 minutes to an hour. Not only did it feel great to move my body throughout a week that is more often known for lounging and eating, but the power of walking and talking was on full display. We filled each other in on jobs and home projects, kids and parents, travel and health and plans for next year. I am grateful for the siblings I married into, and relished the opportunity to catch up with some of my favorite people in this way. I hope you were able to find moments of connection this week, too.
To wrap up this year’s gift guides, I thought I’d share a few of the items I’ve squirreled away for my family’s stockings. Linking is a bit difficult, since I prefer to pick up items throughout the year as I visit small shops and boutiques, but I’ve noted the same or similar items where possible. I hope it’s helpful! (And if you want to finish your shopping in one go, don’t forget about my friends’ ingenious one-stop stocking shop, Persnickety Gifts!)
Annie:
— A new water bottle and a handful of stickers from our summer travels to jumpstart decorating it — Color-changing flame packets for s’mores nights (I’ll split these up between the kids!) — A kitty pencil pouch for all her treasures — An adorable little deer stuffie — Fairy house supplies from our local garden store — A sheet of Bluey stickers — A Liberty fabric knotted headband — A few Schleich animals — Hair elastics — The most fun bandaids — Some sort of candy
Shep:
— A handful of Yoto cards stored up from our subscription — A roll of Scotch tape, since he’s forever borrowing mine — A mini paper airplane set — Cherry sour balls from Michigan favorite Cherry Republic — The most adorable little lantern. (All of the kids are going to go nuts for this and I probably should have bought three…) — Tattly dino tattoos — 50 silly scavenger hunts — A camo tank and camo jeep — A new paint-by-sticker book, his favorite — Glow in the dark stickers — A few new Hot Wheels (I think I’ll see if there are any on our neighborhood Buy Nothing group!)
By popular request, I’m transposing the conceit of my gift guide for kids to this one – gifts for the people you love – by sharing what I’m actually gifting to a few of the loveliest people in my life this Christmas. Plus, I’ve included a few notes on gifts that have landed well in the past, in the hopes that one might be the right for your husband, mom, dad, sister, in-law, or beloved teacher.
(And on that note, if you are any of those people, close out this post pronto. Please and thank you :))
In the past, I’ve gifted experiences (Jim Gaffigan, Nate Bargatze, a treetop adventure course), this chair that folds up tiny, LOTS of clothing (this, this, this, this, this, and this most recently), a tumbler, a Durham Bulls shirt, a NYT crossword puzzle book, a Soda Stream (still used daily four years later), a weather station, and a very suave briefcase. (The briefcase linked is not exactly the same, but as close as I could find from the same brand – I bought John’s in 2018. It’s been used daily and still looks handsome!)
In the last few years he’s also bought himself a ruck carrier and plate, a down coat with hood, a fleece jacket and hat (both seen above), and some Ugg boots – after lusting after my warm toes for years. And don’t forget this post on some of John’s clothing favorites – lots of good ideas in there! One to highlight: the Legends sweater shirt, which is still his favorite thing to wear. Looks like a flannel, is as incredibly soft and stretchy as the best sweatshirt.
Oh yes, and don’t forget books: though John doesn’t read a ton of them himself (he’s more of an articles guy), he loves to support his favorite authors and thinkers by adding their offerings to the collection on his nightstand :) A few new additions this year: Fighting Shadows, The Divine Conspiracy, The Anxious Generation, and How to Know a Person.
My Dad will get a continuation of the Atlantic subscription I started for him a few years ago, and whose articles we enjoy discussing together – though I’m intrigued by this grill prep and carry set that is being gifted by several members of Articles Club this year.
For his Dad, John chose a gift basket of food goodies from Asheville. It’s a little more than the limit (see below), but it’s in support of our beloved mountains, so we’ll just consider the overage a donation :)
On John’s side of the family, the siblings and parents draw names — everyone gifts to one other person with a $100 limit. I drew my mother-in-law and chose for her a weighted vest (I got the 6 lb version!), a stick-on bird feeder, and the cutest seed birdhouse from a local garden store (above!).
On my side of the family, the siblings and husbands have opted to splurge on a fancy dinner out, together, in lieu of gifts over the last few years – and this year, too. However, my younger sister Kim will be joining us for Christmas morning this year, and per my desire to leave no one out of the gifting, I’m planning to wrap up a few small things for her: a set of 2025 PowerSheets (perk of the job!), a caramel tasting set from Trader Joe’s, a watercolor workbook, and a Ghiradelli’s brownie mix paired with a little bottle of blood orange olive oil. (You swap the flavored olive oil for the canola oil called for in the recipe – so delicious!!)
My Mom is going to get this Blackwatch pullover from my own wish list – she likes most of what I like and as a diehard New Englander, loves an L.L. Bean gift :)
All of the kids’ teachers will be getting a gift card to a local business, matched to their interests, and a very grateful note.
A few other gifts we’ve given in the past for your consideration:
— Chappy Wraps | Light yet cozy with the prettiest patterns. This is the go-to blanket on our sofa and we’ve gifted one to my parents, too!
— Original Bogg Bag | We use ours at the pool, the beach, and the soccer field, but I think they’re particularly helpful for road trip packing.
— Snap tote | They fold up flat and snap open to fit a ton – I use mine at least weekly, and have had it for years!
— Boat & Tote bags | Incredibly sturdy and incredibly classic. I like mine open top, in navy, with sans serif embroidery. I find this to be a versatile gift at a great price point that’s easy to personalize – you could embroider her initials, nickname, or something funny or practical! Plus, they introduced the most beautiful medium blue this year!
— Geometry napkins | I split two packs of these between my Mom and I for Mother’s Day this year, and they were a hit with both of us! The suede-like material requires no ironing for a smooth fold and there are dozens and dozens of patterns to choose from.
— Something meaningful, framed | We recently gifted John’s parents a house portrait as a housewarming gift and framed it with Framebridge – a favorite I’ve used for many projects over the years. There are lots of house portrait options on Etsy, too!
— Solo stove | Yes, this gift was all the rage a few years ago, but it’s still worth a mention! Produces a near-smokeless fire in a compact, good-looking package. Pair with extendable sticks and the absolute best thing to sandwich a marshmallow between.
— Tea kettle | An elegant countertop tea kettle for the tea, coffee, or hot chocolate drinker in your life! We’ve gifted these twice and they’re always a hit. Lots of fun options for this one – pair it with some gourmet or meaningful tea or coffee, a pretty tea towel, and/or a mug that will make them smile!
— Something from White Flower Farm | This is my father-in-law’s favorite plant source, and we have ordered many things from them over the years! Bulbs, wreaths, flowering houseplants – or a gift card for them to choose something for their yard.
— A photo gift | Don’t sleep on the photo mug, friends! Are they a little cheesy? Yes. Do lots of grandparents legitimately want one? Absolutely yes, but they’re not, you know, something you’re going to buy for yourself. A personalized calendar with photos from the year is another sure bet!
— A live wreath | This was our go-to teacher gift for several years running – we bought simple wreaths from a local fundraiser and dressed them up with bows. I have also done the same for hostess gifts! L.L. Bean has beautiful options if you need to ship.
— A media subscription | Whether physical or digital, this is one of my favorite things to give. In recent years, I’ve given an Our State subscription to a friend, an Atlantic subscription to my Dad, and a So Many Thoughts subscription to my Mom.
— A digital picture frame | The siblings went in on this for John’s parents a few years ago, and it’s so easy to upload new photos by email!
Whew!! I sincerely hope you found an idea in there for the ones you love, or that something I listed sparked an even better idea. And happiest Thanksgiving, friends! I’ll be back with a final gift guide on Friday :)
